sheesh.
I am now the proud (?) owner of the little magic pink slip that is my temporary ambulance driver's license. (which is actually a certificate, and my wallet is crying now at all the shit I have to carry.) (...ok, so it's been crying for a long time, because I have all manner of random entertaining crap stuffed in there, but now the little window that usually just holds my driver's license is crying because it now holds my license, my medical examiner's certificate (which does not, despite the name, mean I am certified as a medical examiner but rather I have been examined BY a medical examiner, which is also misdirecting because a PA is not a ME. misdirecting is not the word I wanted. neither is it illusary nor distracting nor misapprehensive, all words suggested by my brain, which I think has been broken by NaNoWriMo. uh. where was I? oh. right. list of crap in wallet...) my ambulance driver's certificate, my NREMT EMT card, my Alameda County EMT certificate, and my two CPR cards. )
You think that's bad? you should see certain parts of my NaNoWriMo draft. holy freaking ouch, batman.
anyway. The Saga Of the ADL, or How I Learned To Stop Worrying and GO BUGNUTS CRAZY.
1.) Marit needs to get her Ambulance Driver's License. she is told when getting her California DL that she needs to pick up a commercial driver's license handbook and study it, then come back when employed because then the employer will pay the fee for it. ok. fine. the CDL book is horribly confusing and was clearly laid out by drunken monkeys.
2a.) All employers state that already having your ADL is either preferential, nets you more monies at start, or is required, and they also need a 10 year history printout. greeeaaaat. Marit goes to DMV.
2b.) Monday. Marit gets form to fill out and number. form is worrisome because is exactly the same form as filled out for California license. oh well. *CUE MAGIC TIME WARP* wherin Marit receives number from desk lady, walks 5 steps to bench, writes her name on form, and is told by nice man that her number just got called. Elapsed time, 2 minutes. maybe. at most. yet somehow the desk calling her number manages to spend '5 minutes' calling her number 4 times.
Not. Bloody. Likely.
Marit has to go fetch new number. Marit now gets to wait. and wait. and wait. Is beginning to realize that hm, perhaps the prayer stole was not the best choice of knitting projects to bring along to an environment that is engineered to cause hypertension. Marit waits more.
2c.) Marit's number is called! goes to designated desk, hands over paperwork, receives two printouts of driving history (and is complimented on Dr Who scarf and clean record.) on to ADL. gets sheet, pays money, gets medical history form, gets refund form because overcharged (DMV used to do livescan, but no longer), nice blonde lady sticks all my stuff in a manila folder, gives me receipt of payment and refund form, highlights where to send refund form, tells me she's back at work on wednesday so I can drop off my livescan and ME form and take my exam and bob's your uncle. turns out I don't actually need a commercial driver's license, just a certificate that I can drive an ambulance. (not even a road test, just a written test. AND you don't need to be an EMT to get your ADL, just that you get your EMT cert within a year of getting your ADL. what?) Marit is confused because watch says it's only 1315-ish, but ok, whatever. looks at cell phone. oh. it's 1540. stupid watch. Marit goes to BNN and gets coffee. mmm. coffee. shush. is on way to BART, which is on way to livescan.
2d.) Marit goes to livescan. nice livescan people tell me how to be tricksy with DMV, because apparently the DMV won't accept a livescan form unless it's their yellow copy. can't be white. must be yellow carbon copy. you keep pink. So Mr Livescan tells me go grab a form from DMV, walk outside, copy the info from his form (which is identical to DMV form), take white and pink copies, and walk back inside to give them yellow form. Mr Livescan also gives me 3 copies and only charges for 1. Marit likes Mr Livescan. see? this is what gets you repeat business.
3a.) Wednesday. Marit goes to doctor. entertaining moment of eye test: wearing glasses, have 20/20 left and 20/15 right. great. PA says to tech that they need to do an unaided exam. I can save you the trouble, I said; I can't see the wall. "oh, we have to do it anyway, it's a red box." (you must fill out all red boxes OR YOU WILL DIE). I go stand on line, take off glasses, and say "yep. sorry. can't see wall. I can barely see your hand pointing at the letters. I know the first row is E and the second is FP, but that's just because there's only so many eyecharts available and I've had glasses since the second grade. on other charts it's E then down-E and right-E, or HOTV, or Circle Heart Square, but trust me, I can't see the wall. I promise not to drive without my glasses. I promise not to walk without my glasses." They write down 20/200 (really should be 20/800, but oh well). Doc asks me if I'm up on Pap and stuff. I wince. No, I'm not, I know, I really need to come in, but Blue Cross Blue Shield of California is being evil and pretending they haven't gotten info from you guys and you guys say you haven't received their request for said info, and I can't get through their system to talk to a real person, and I'm currently uninsured. Doc blinks and says 'oh.' and knocks down the price for me. yay. see? this is what also gets you repeat business.
3b.) Thursday. Marit goes to DMV, gets number, waits. waits. waits. Learning has not occured, has not brought other knitting than prayer stole. waits. Goes cheerily up to desk when finally called. hands over livescan. Gets exam receipt and goes to take exam. passes. goes back to deliver ME form and get temporary ADL.
then the fun happens:
at the top of every page of the medical form, there is a big red box for my driver's license number, name, and SSN. right below it on page 2 there is a line (NOT in a red-must-fill-out-on-pain-of-death box) saying "Identity verified by...[] Driver's license (no:) [] other (please explain:)." the PA checked DL, but didn't write down DL number, because it's right above it and isn't IN RED. also, the vision test has three lines, like this:
Right Eye:
Left Eye:
Both Eyes:
in a red box.
Orange highlighter comes out. form gets highlighted.
DMV man: "you're missing a driver's license number here."
Me: "...it's written right above it."
DMV man: "it needs to be written here."
Me: "ok, give it to me, I'll write it in."
DMV man: "the doctor needs to write it in."
Me: "...it's not a required red box. she wrote it IN a red box, right above it."
DMV man: "it has to be filled in by the doctor."
Me: "she did fill it in. on every page. in a red box. four times. but even though it's not a required red box, I have to go back and have her write my driver's license number down, again, less than a centimeter away from where she already wrote it down."
DMV man: "you also need to have them write in the unaided vision for your right and left eyes."
Me: "the test didn't need to be performed, she wrote down for both, right there, see? 20/200."
DMV man: "it has to be done. it's a red box."
Me: "if I can't see the sign with both eyes unaided, I'm not going to be able to see the sign with either eye alone."
DMV man: "it's a red box. it's required."
Me: "Fine. give it back. I will go back to the doctor and bother her to write down my driver's license, again, and write down that I am totally and completely ridiculously blind without corrective lenses, which we already knew, and come back here. is there anything else that needs to be filled in? so that I don't have to leave and come back again?" (I totally didn't say it like that. I was able to swallow most of Teh Bitchy Marmot. most.)
DMV man: "you have to have her stamp it."
Me: "Fine. Can I have my pink sheet?"
DMV man: "no, I need the ME form."
Me: "but I've paid for it. I can't use it without the ME form, which is fine, I won't be using it until I'm employed, but you can still give it to me. I can be in possession of it, it's like being in possession of expired insurance. it's useless, but not illegal to have."
DMV man: "no, I can't, not without the ME form."
Me: "then give me back my receipt of payment."
DMV man: "it's in with your paperwork, it's fine."
Me: "FINE." about to esplode, so time to leave. I do believe I may have accomplished flouncing without a skirt, difficult as that sounds.
3c.) Marit walks to Peet's and gets eggnog freddo blended coffee thing. mmm. blendynog. calls doc. explains fun with DMV HELL and gets OK to come fix form.
3d.) Marit walks into office. Explains, points out places needing fixing. receptionist gives me the eyebrow-raised "really?" face. I nod. yes, really. she stamps office stamp on form. doc who saw me has gone home, but other PA gives me "really?" face (yes, really.) and writes in 20/200 twice on form, and writes out DL number. fun dialogue: "oh, can I see your driver's lic-oh, wait, it's written right here. *pause, gives me 'really?' face.* they made you come back for this?" (yes, really.) Marit pops into Whole Foods for orchard smoothy of goodness before slipping onto bus.
3e.) Marit is really regretting wearing shoes of the 'I need mood-booster of cuteness' type instead of 'I can walk all day and not care' type. target flats = cute yes, supportive no.
3f.) Marit gets back to DMV. is maybe 30 min to closing. DMV man non vis, so has to get new number. waits. waits. walks to desk when called. "here's my medical form! give me ADL please!" plasters content face on....the end is in sight! yay!
orange highlighter comes out. oh, fuck no, sister. noooononono. no way. no. bloody. way.
the red box for heart rate has two boxes to be checked; one says 'regular' and the other 'irregular' and underneath 'irregular' is the word 'rate.' the doc (and I) took this to mean 'if you check 'regular,' no numerical rate is required.'
But no. it is A RED BOX. red boxes must be filled out OR THE WORLD WILL END IN FLAMES. I shake my head as she is highlighting.
Me: "No, no. The doctor said that if the rate was regular, the numerical rate was not required. that's how your red box is structured. That box is filled out."
DMV Woman: "the red boxes has to be filled out."
Me: "...it is!"
DMV Woman: "all red boxes-" (I interrupt.)
Me: "The doctor told me that the box was filled out as is."
DMV Woman fetches supervisor.
DMV Supervisor: "hello, ma'am, I've spoken to-"
Me: "Fine. Give it back." I will not cry in the DMV. I will not cry in the DMV. I might scream in the DMV, but that might make the rent-a-cops do something they might regret. I will not scream OR cry in the DMV.
walk my way back to BART. have fallen off end of rope. nice (but very blurry- am walking without glasses. hah you bastards I promised not to walk without corrective lenses AND I DID. and totally didn't walk into any trees, either. branches...well...) lady asks me if I'm ok. I mumble something about end of horrible day just want to get home to bathtub whimper.
fun fact: it's now after 1700 and Marit realizes the only sustenance she has taken in was a greek yogurt at 0830 and the blendynog and the orchard smoothy of goodness. the fateful decision to not stop at great little sandwich place in berserkeley is instantly regretted.
4a.) Marit revolts and does absolutely nothing related to DMV or job search or anything other than go from bathtub to curled up in bed to bathtub to curled up on couch mainlining Advil for all of Friday. Screw you, Uterus. Awesome timing.
5a). calls doctor on saturday. "hi, it's me, the DMV form girl, I have another box that needs to be filled in."
"really?"
"yes. apparently despite the formatting of their box they need a heart rate for a normal rhythm anyway."
"um."
"yes?"
"you're doing this for your ambulance driver's certificate, right? and you're an EMT?'
"yes."
"and they want you to come in and have a doctor take your pulse and write it in their box."
"yep."
"...but you're an EMT."
"I know."
"um...you can't take your own pulse? I mean...the PA's already signed it...not that you should cheat on a form, I don't mean...but...you're an EMT."
"I know. Believe me, I know. if it weren't for the certainty that if I did just take my own pulse and write it in, they would somehow know and I'd have to start over or get audited or whatever medieval torture they have planned for offences like that, I would just fill it in myself. When can I stop by?"
"Monday?"
"See you Monday."
5b.) walk in to doctor's office. Doc: "so, what's your pulse?" Me: "84." Doc: "really? *checks* huh." Me: "I know. my BP's on the low end, HR on the high end. Always has been." Doc: "no coffee?" Me: "Not yet." Doc: "huh. Well, good luck."
5c.) walk in to DMV. get number. wait. wait. (learning has occured. Marit brought a book instead of prayer stole.) wait. wait. goes up to desk when summoned. Hands over ME form. DMV woman 2 disappears. Now, I had to do a good deal of waiting at the desk with the first edition of DMV (see 2c), but she always said something along the lines of 'I'm going to go ::insert task here::' or 'I just need to check with ____, I haven't done one of these yet' before disappearing, and told me that I could take a seat if I was more comfortable that way. (there's a reason why she is DMV Lady in my head and the others are DMV woman.) DMV woman just disappears. she wanders from the left side of the building to the right side of the building, disappears into the back, reappears, wanders circuit again...four people rotate through the desk next to hers. finally, after at least 30 min of being gone, when Teh Bitchy Marmot is about to make an appearance, she reappears and hands over the little pink slip.
6.) Marit makes good her escape, then makes wallet cry by stuffing pink slip in wallet. goes for blendynog. mmm. blendynog.
Thus endeth the saga.
Next: the Jobhunting Strikes Back.
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
The Marmot...
...can't come to the blog right now, she's climbing a clock tower.
(that's not entirely correct, of course, she's actually climbing into the bathtub with her homemade dose of -OH's.)
fill glass with ice.
add 2 shots of espresso.
add 2 shots homemade marquesan vanilla vodka (shush, I have earned it, and it'll cancel out the espresso so that I can go to bed before 0200.)
fill to top of glass with cream.
mmmmmmmm.
Not so in line with my 'eat smart' current philosophy, but then I'm not drinking this every day, and since all I've eaten today is a cup of greek yogurt (take that yoplait-that-makes-me-hungry-again-in-an-hour!), a muffin, a sugarless hard candy from the doctor's office, and the wonderful orchard blended iced beverage from Whole Foods Market that is now retired for the season (SAD!), I think I'm ok with some calories.
Although I am going to make a sandwich before I hit the tub.
Which I'm doing now.
(that's not entirely correct, of course, she's actually climbing into the bathtub with her homemade dose of -OH's.)
fill glass with ice.
add 2 shots of espresso.
add 2 shots homemade marquesan vanilla vodka (shush, I have earned it, and it'll cancel out the espresso so that I can go to bed before 0200.)
fill to top of glass with cream.
mmmmmmmm.
Not so in line with my 'eat smart' current philosophy, but then I'm not drinking this every day, and since all I've eaten today is a cup of greek yogurt (take that yoplait-that-makes-me-hungry-again-in-an-hour!), a muffin, a sugarless hard candy from the doctor's office, and the wonderful orchard blended iced beverage from Whole Foods Market that is now retired for the season (SAD!), I think I'm ok with some calories.
Although I am going to make a sandwich before I hit the tub.
Which I'm doing now.
Monday, November 10, 2008
oooooo....
you know what I really really want right now?
sopapillas.
real sopapillas, all puffy and gooey and ready to dip in honey or cinnamon sugar.
so. good.
sopapillas.
real sopapillas, all puffy and gooey and ready to dip in honey or cinnamon sugar.
so. good.
oh kitty.
oh, kitty.
I love the fact that at the end he looks at the camera and goes "oh, crap" and runs away.
off to DMV to get driver printouts and set up an appointment to take my ambulance driver's test, and then do a test run up to my interview tomorrow in Vallejo.
Bah. oh well, I am fortified by knitting.
Saturday, November 08, 2008
I desperately need to be happy.
because otherwise I can't think good happy healing thoughts while at the same time reading a lace chart and knitting my merry way on the prayer scarf, which needs to be to its recipient before she leaves for India in December.
So.
Things That Make Me Happy:
Origins Spice Odyssey. sooooo nummy. I love it. it's scrubby and smells like cookies and curry and cardamom and I used it twice today because after I washed my hair I felt all conditioner-covered (cause I use me some in-tense conditioner because I have (according to Deoni) The Hair That Forgot It's On A White Chick) and not all scrubbed and spicy like I had earlier in my shower, so I used it again. Also, the matcha scrub is very nice BUT if you forget and shave first, Do Not Use The Scrub. PUT DOWN THE CONTAINER. oh dear god the pain.
Ravelry. because any fibre arts community website that contains the forum topic "I need cell transfection help" is a fibre arts community that is just plain freakin' awesome. also the Yarn Harlot and Crazy Aunt Purl.
Food Network. Angry Brits bleeping away while trying to save restaurants from utter failure, The Nastiest Ingredients Known To Man turned into desserts for hapless young japanese actresses, crazy psycho jungle cakes, Alton Brown...get rid of Bobby Flay and RayRay and I might go so far as to say it is perfect.
Cappelens Nye Kokebok. aside from the fact that it forces me to do lots of painful math, Best Cookbook Ever. 640 pages of goodness.
Mae Ploy. soooo nummy, the gentle Scientist Finn Jan Wittig defended his bottle on pain of death when the ship's stock ran out.
Chap Che. Spicy Spicy Spicy goodness. especially if you grab the extra-spicy kimchi instead of the normal stuff. whooo mama. and Bi Bim Bap. the perfect combination of every type of goodness. while it is vanishingly unlikely that I have Korean in my genetic code, my tastebuds have clearly adopted Korea as their motherland.
Egg Drop Soup. best. comfort food. EVER. my secondary mom saved my life with a giant thermos of this delivered to my dying hacking wheezing self in the hotel during the Thanksgiving Break Of Death so that I could get better enough to fake perfect health (along with Mucinex) and get on the boat.
Thai Coconut Rice Pudding. or Black Sticky Rice Pudding. or my Nana's Rice Pudding. also best comfort food ever.
Legos. ...cause they're legos. and they've got Iiiindeeeeeeee! and I totally want to use these to make a Legotini! and Lego Stego!
speaking of stego, Stegosaurs. (that would be the plural of stegosaurus, y'see.) best late Jurassic dino EVER. I have a wee little stegosaurus charm, and would totally consider a stego tattoo. I may have moved on to the biological oceanography love, but deep in the cockles of my heart still lurks the tiny paleontologist. I had a shirt and everything. also: someone make this in a woman's 10.5/ euro 41. I WANT. kids get the best shoes. man.
Mom's Chipotle Raspberry Brownies or Mom's Chipotle Chocolate Truffle Blobs.
Snow. Mountains. Skiing. Nordlys. Why am I living in California again? (also, the image for the nordlys? is totally from Curt's homepage. Skog x 100 for the win!) Dammit, Tahoe, get enough snow already. we need a repeat of the Big Mountain, Small Scary Crappy Hotel in Reno trip. I promise not to try to kill The Boy the way I did last year.
XKCD. one of my favorite webcomics. hands down. also Girl Genius, Dominic Deegan, Schlock Mercenary, BratHalla, Oddfish (oh, come on, a 'kebab!' sound effect? priceless.), Nemi, wapsi square, so many more. Nice Hair, winner of the 'still makes me actually laugh out loud really hard' award. Friendly Hostility, because I am such a Fatima Fangirl.
The Bobbie C. love that boat. also, check it out! that's us* deploying an ARGO!
*us being the SEA Education Association on the Robert C Seamans, but it's not our cruise because the photo is credited to Kara Lavender, and she wasn't on our cruise. She had to stay on land, and we got the coffee-addicted skivvie-wearing Finn.
Kittehs. Mine and the occasional lolcat that makes me giggle.
This pen. I loooove this pen, even though I have abused it by taking it on too many flights (air pressure + fountain pen = May Not End Well) and then tried to clean the crusted ink out of the cap (see aforementioned air pressure + fountain pen) with acetone in O-chem and frosted the top half of the cap. (apparently there's a plastic cushion/guard for the nib up there.) I also lust after this pen, but why god why so expensive?
Chihuly.
Chihuly.
Chihuly.
Santorini. Crete. Actually, any place where my grandfather is my tour guide.
Ok. Time to go to work.
So.
Things That Make Me Happy:
Origins Spice Odyssey. sooooo nummy. I love it. it's scrubby and smells like cookies and curry and cardamom and I used it twice today because after I washed my hair I felt all conditioner-covered (cause I use me some in-tense conditioner because I have (according to Deoni) The Hair That Forgot It's On A White Chick) and not all scrubbed and spicy like I had earlier in my shower, so I used it again. Also, the matcha scrub is very nice BUT if you forget and shave first, Do Not Use The Scrub. PUT DOWN THE CONTAINER. oh dear god the pain.
Ravelry. because any fibre arts community website that contains the forum topic "I need cell transfection help" is a fibre arts community that is just plain freakin' awesome. also the Yarn Harlot and Crazy Aunt Purl.
Food Network. Angry Brits bleeping away while trying to save restaurants from utter failure, The Nastiest Ingredients Known To Man turned into desserts for hapless young japanese actresses, crazy psycho jungle cakes, Alton Brown...get rid of Bobby Flay and RayRay and I might go so far as to say it is perfect.
Cappelens Nye Kokebok. aside from the fact that it forces me to do lots of painful math, Best Cookbook Ever. 640 pages of goodness.
Mae Ploy. soooo nummy, the gentle Scientist Finn Jan Wittig defended his bottle on pain of death when the ship's stock ran out.
Chap Che. Spicy Spicy Spicy goodness. especially if you grab the extra-spicy kimchi instead of the normal stuff. whooo mama. and Bi Bim Bap. the perfect combination of every type of goodness. while it is vanishingly unlikely that I have Korean in my genetic code, my tastebuds have clearly adopted Korea as their motherland.
Egg Drop Soup. best. comfort food. EVER. my secondary mom saved my life with a giant thermos of this delivered to my dying hacking wheezing self in the hotel during the Thanksgiving Break Of Death so that I could get better enough to fake perfect health (along with Mucinex) and get on the boat.
Thai Coconut Rice Pudding. or Black Sticky Rice Pudding. or my Nana's Rice Pudding. also best comfort food ever.
Legos. ...cause they're legos. and they've got Iiiindeeeeeeee! and I totally want to use these to make a Legotini! and Lego Stego!
speaking of stego, Stegosaurs. (that would be the plural of stegosaurus, y'see.) best late Jurassic dino EVER. I have a wee little stegosaurus charm, and would totally consider a stego tattoo. I may have moved on to the biological oceanography love, but deep in the cockles of my heart still lurks the tiny paleontologist. I had a shirt and everything. also: someone make this in a woman's 10.5/ euro 41. I WANT. kids get the best shoes. man.
Mom's Chipotle Raspberry Brownies or Mom's Chipotle Chocolate Truffle Blobs.
Snow. Mountains. Skiing. Nordlys. Why am I living in California again? (also, the image for the nordlys? is totally from Curt's homepage. Skog x 100 for the win!) Dammit, Tahoe, get enough snow already. we need a repeat of the Big Mountain, Small Scary Crappy Hotel in Reno trip. I promise not to try to kill The Boy the way I did last year.
XKCD. one of my favorite webcomics. hands down. also Girl Genius, Dominic Deegan, Schlock Mercenary, BratHalla, Oddfish (oh, come on, a 'kebab!' sound effect? priceless.), Nemi, wapsi square, so many more. Nice Hair, winner of the 'still makes me actually laugh out loud really hard' award. Friendly Hostility, because I am such a Fatima Fangirl.
The Bobbie C. love that boat. also, check it out! that's us* deploying an ARGO!
*us being the SEA Education Association on the Robert C Seamans, but it's not our cruise because the photo is credited to Kara Lavender, and she wasn't on our cruise. She had to stay on land, and we got the coffee-addicted skivvie-wearing Finn.
Kittehs. Mine and the occasional lolcat that makes me giggle.
This pen. I loooove this pen, even though I have abused it by taking it on too many flights (air pressure + fountain pen = May Not End Well) and then tried to clean the crusted ink out of the cap (see aforementioned air pressure + fountain pen) with acetone in O-chem and frosted the top half of the cap. (apparently there's a plastic cushion/guard for the nib up there.) I also lust after this pen, but why god why so expensive?
Chihuly.
Chihuly.
Chihuly.
Santorini. Crete. Actually, any place where my grandfather is my tour guide.
Ok. Time to go to work.
Thursday, November 06, 2008
I'm never going to finish this scarf.
Hi.
If you try to tell me that marriage is between a man and a woman because of a basic, natural, biological imperative, then I get to legally dissolve every union between a man and woman who have no children or who cannot naturally conceive children. low sperm count? sorry, your marriage is null and void, and oh, by the way, you can never marry again. single parent with no visitation rights from the other parent? sorry, your kids can't be raised in that environment, I'm taking them away. philosophically against the idea of increasing the earth's population? I'm sorry, you and your spouse are now exes...and your adopted kid is going to the Duggars...unless you can prove you can spawn.
what? that's your argument. children can't be raised in an environment that isn't a nuclear family because the mother-father-child bond is too sacred.
so we've saved the children from the spectre of being raised by gays. now let's save the children from being raised by single parents. who's with me?
OH RIGHT. that's wrong and discriminatory. hmmm. really?
check this out: screw you, strip down the middle of california. also, what's up with you, solano county? didn't get the "Gay Area" message? also also: filter based on bachelor's degrees. *cue banjo...*
skippy, get back in the box.
yep. still bitter.
If you try to tell me that marriage is between a man and a woman because of a basic, natural, biological imperative, then I get to legally dissolve every union between a man and woman who have no children or who cannot naturally conceive children. low sperm count? sorry, your marriage is null and void, and oh, by the way, you can never marry again. single parent with no visitation rights from the other parent? sorry, your kids can't be raised in that environment, I'm taking them away. philosophically against the idea of increasing the earth's population? I'm sorry, you and your spouse are now exes...and your adopted kid is going to the Duggars...unless you can prove you can spawn.
what? that's your argument. children can't be raised in an environment that isn't a nuclear family because the mother-father-child bond is too sacred.
so we've saved the children from the spectre of being raised by gays. now let's save the children from being raised by single parents. who's with me?
OH RIGHT. that's wrong and discriminatory. hmmm. really?
check this out: screw you, strip down the middle of california. also, what's up with you, solano county? didn't get the "Gay Area" message? also also: filter based on bachelor's degrees. *cue banjo...*
skippy, get back in the box.
yep. still bitter.
Wednesday, November 05, 2008
Explain this to me.
Okay, California. Explain this to me:
61% of you voted for Barack Obama.
63.2% of you voted for Prop 2, which (may or may not) better conditions for livestock.
52.5% of you voted to strip the right of marriage from anyone who happens to fall in love with someone carrying their same sex chromosomes.
I'm so happy to live in a state where a chicken gets more rights and attention than me.
so happy.
what's even crazier?
y'all voted against the parental notification for underage abortions.
who knew that The Gay was so terrifying that the mere thought of Your Blessed Innocent learning about love would distract you from the Killing of Unborn Bebbies by Babies.
oh, you say, but domestic partnerships are the same thing.
except for being able to file joint tax returns.
and your earnings aren't community property for the state taxes.
you have to live at the same residence to register, so those long distances? nope, sorry.
you can't move out of state and still be domestically partnered.
if one of you isn't a US citizen, you cannot become naturalized through your domestic partnership.
and under federal law your partner has no rights or responsibilities of a legal spouse. (thank* you, Defense of Marriage Act.)
Here's what the Universal Declaration of Human Rights has to say about marriage: "Men and women of full age, without any limitation due to race, nationality or religion, have the right to marry and to found a family. They are entitled to equal rights as to marriage, during marriage and at its dissolution. Marriage shall be entered into only with the free and full consent of the intending spouses."
does that say anything at all about The Gay? No. Oh, but wait, it's a document from the UN, which apparently we don't need or care about cause they're a bunch of furriner pansies.
this shit just sickens me. seriously.
*that should really read 'fuck' by the way, but I'm trying to be nice.
gah.
enough.
Look! Cuteness! move along, move along, there is no kitteh in the box...move along...
this is taken after he scared the crap out of me. the flap that's up was down, and I had no idea he was in there, when suddenly he leapt out of the box and tried to jump onto the arm of the chair.
he failed, left divots in the chair, and fell back into the box. That, or my shriek scared him back in the box.
this cat....all the cat toys in the house, and he goes nuts over pencils. knitting needles. the little hard plastic cups my razor heads come in. cardboard boxes. he's like the kid who liked playing with the box or the wrapping paper more than the gift itself.
oh wait, that was me.
mmm. bubble wrap.
61% of you voted for Barack Obama.
63.2% of you voted for Prop 2, which (may or may not) better conditions for livestock.
52.5% of you voted to strip the right of marriage from anyone who happens to fall in love with someone carrying their same sex chromosomes.
I'm so happy to live in a state where a chicken gets more rights and attention than me.
so happy.
what's even crazier?
y'all voted against the parental notification for underage abortions.
who knew that The Gay was so terrifying that the mere thought of Your Blessed Innocent learning about love would distract you from the Killing of Unborn Bebbies by Babies.
oh, you say, but domestic partnerships are the same thing.
except for being able to file joint tax returns.
and your earnings aren't community property for the state taxes.
you have to live at the same residence to register, so those long distances? nope, sorry.
you can't move out of state and still be domestically partnered.
if one of you isn't a US citizen, you cannot become naturalized through your domestic partnership.
and under federal law your partner has no rights or responsibilities of a legal spouse. (thank* you, Defense of Marriage Act.)
Here's what the Universal Declaration of Human Rights has to say about marriage: "Men and women of full age, without any limitation due to race, nationality or religion, have the right to marry and to found a family. They are entitled to equal rights as to marriage, during marriage and at its dissolution. Marriage shall be entered into only with the free and full consent of the intending spouses."
does that say anything at all about The Gay? No. Oh, but wait, it's a document from the UN, which apparently we don't need or care about cause they're a bunch of furriner pansies.
this shit just sickens me. seriously.
*that should really read 'fuck' by the way, but I'm trying to be nice.
gah.
enough.
Look! Cuteness! move along, move along, there is no kitteh in the box...move along...
this is taken after he scared the crap out of me. the flap that's up was down, and I had no idea he was in there, when suddenly he leapt out of the box and tried to jump onto the arm of the chair.
he failed, left divots in the chair, and fell back into the box. That, or my shriek scared him back in the box.
this cat....all the cat toys in the house, and he goes nuts over pencils. knitting needles. the little hard plastic cups my razor heads come in. cardboard boxes. he's like the kid who liked playing with the box or the wrapping paper more than the gift itself.
oh wait, that was me.
mmm. bubble wrap.
Tuesday, November 04, 2008
mass tree genocide masquerading as political mass mailings.
let's count the mail roundup for this election, shall we?
City Council:
Boozé- 2
Beckles- 6
Butt- 3
Ritterman- 1
Beckles, Butt, and Ritterman- 3
Sandhu- 5
Bates- 10
Marquez- 7 (including a potholder! ooo...)
and 3 fliers endorsing no one but dis-endorsing Ritterman.
School Board:
Pfeifer- 4
Studdiford- 1
Pfeifer, Studdiford, and Bates- 2
'Local Police and Firefighters' both endorse Sandhu and Bates, which entertains me. Almost as much as all the black and orange "Boozé for City Council" (yes, I am afflicted with a childish sense of humor.)
Also have a crapload (i.e. 8) against T and 2 for it, and 5 for D, and one for WW.
Just on sheer perversity, I'm tempted to vote for the people that sent me the least amount of crap in the mail. And whoever Sandhu got to design his stuff deserves a raise; it's pretty sweet.
and you Yes on Proposition 8 people? if you're so fucking paranoid about your kindergartener learning that same sex marriage is the same as hetero marriage, then I have two things to say to you: 1) they already know about The Gay. trust me. 2) pull them out of public school and put them in some nasty little private school that endorses only your history, your ideals, your morals, and your narrow little world view.
not that all private schools are bad. I have no firsthand experience, I'm a public school brat. Well, no, that's a lie, I did go to a private school in Utah briefly because schools like the Open Classroom are dependent on good teachers, not Teachers From The Ninth Circle Of Hell. The Open Classroom may not have been a public school either, now that I think about it.
Ok. Most of my formative school years were public school. happy?
Free Starbucks and Ben and Jerry's for all y'all who voted. I didn't partake because it would have meant about 5 dollars transit fee, which is a bit more than 'free.'
City Council:
Boozé- 2
Beckles- 6
Butt- 3
Ritterman- 1
Beckles, Butt, and Ritterman- 3
Sandhu- 5
Bates- 10
Marquez- 7 (including a potholder! ooo...)
and 3 fliers endorsing no one but dis-endorsing Ritterman.
School Board:
Pfeifer- 4
Studdiford- 1
Pfeifer, Studdiford, and Bates- 2
'Local Police and Firefighters' both endorse Sandhu and Bates, which entertains me. Almost as much as all the black and orange "Boozé for City Council" (yes, I am afflicted with a childish sense of humor.)
Also have a crapload (i.e. 8) against T and 2 for it, and 5 for D, and one for WW.
Just on sheer perversity, I'm tempted to vote for the people that sent me the least amount of crap in the mail. And whoever Sandhu got to design his stuff deserves a raise; it's pretty sweet.
and you Yes on Proposition 8 people? if you're so fucking paranoid about your kindergartener learning that same sex marriage is the same as hetero marriage, then I have two things to say to you: 1) they already know about The Gay. trust me. 2) pull them out of public school and put them in some nasty little private school that endorses only your history, your ideals, your morals, and your narrow little world view.
not that all private schools are bad. I have no firsthand experience, I'm a public school brat. Well, no, that's a lie, I did go to a private school in Utah briefly because schools like the Open Classroom are dependent on good teachers, not Teachers From The Ninth Circle Of Hell. The Open Classroom may not have been a public school either, now that I think about it.
Ok. Most of my formative school years were public school. happy?
Free Starbucks and Ben and Jerry's for all y'all who voted. I didn't partake because it would have meant about 5 dollars transit fee, which is a bit more than 'free.'
Monday, November 03, 2008
bah.
I've moved to Tacoma. again.
C'mon, rain, you need to stop for at least a day so I can get my poor trees planted in their pots.
Applied for jobs today. This whole idea of applying via email is strange to me. Ah, the march of progress.
Nanowrimo: we're not thinking about that right now. does it still count if I use old characters as long as none of the old writing is counted towards the 50,000?
Knitting: got yarn for prayer scarf. need to wind in balls (damn you hindsight, I should have had the store do it!) and defend it from The Cat.
Spinning: I have a wee little blob of pink yarn. Jayne is still hyperactive from the play session of my attempts to spin. The Boy is still confused as to why I want to make yarn.
When The Kitten gets big (we're reasonably certain he's mostly Norwegian Forest Cat, and they're usually about 13 to 22 lbs. normal cats are supposed to be less than 13 lbs, apparently. and he's 6 months old and almost as long as Raziel, who is 2.) this is going to be uncomfortable.
This is me trying to write the start of NaNoWriMo.
You can see how well it's going.
C'mon, rain, you need to stop for at least a day so I can get my poor trees planted in their pots.
Applied for jobs today. This whole idea of applying via email is strange to me. Ah, the march of progress.
Nanowrimo: we're not thinking about that right now. does it still count if I use old characters as long as none of the old writing is counted towards the 50,000?
Knitting: got yarn for prayer scarf. need to wind in balls (damn you hindsight, I should have had the store do it!) and defend it from The Cat.
Spinning: I have a wee little blob of pink yarn. Jayne is still hyperactive from the play session of my attempts to spin. The Boy is still confused as to why I want to make yarn.
When The Kitten gets big (we're reasonably certain he's mostly Norwegian Forest Cat, and they're usually about 13 to 22 lbs. normal cats are supposed to be less than 13 lbs, apparently. and he's 6 months old and almost as long as Raziel, who is 2.) this is going to be uncomfortable.
This is me trying to write the start of NaNoWriMo.
You can see how well it's going.
Sunday, November 02, 2008
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
um....snif....snurfle...
I don't remember a whole lot of life in New Mexico. I remember a green room with lots of stairs and green carpet (that in true childhood fashion, we played king of the hill on and did our level best to kill each other with), I remember Danielle's house and their cat disappearing (hiya, coyotes!) and her brother not being allowed to play outside and something about a dog, I remember an upturned dish on the floor that I think had a massive cockroach trapped under it but it might have been a scorpion, I remember not being allowed in a shed (although that might have been Utah, now that I think about it), I remember colors and smells and dirt and feelings of age and stillness, and I remember getting into lots of trouble with Arielle (Ariel?) and Danielle, I remember wind and bright and balloons, and I remember a bush. I don't remember why I remember a bush, but it's there. being bushy.
Reading Tony Hillerman's novels made me feel like I'd grown up there, that his words plugged into my kidlet memories and extrapolated them further somehow.
so go read The Blessing Way and don't stop til you get to The Shape Shifter,
because the world has lost another artist, another man with the deft touch that allowed us to smell and breathe and taste the world he created with words on paper, and the truest tribute for him is to fall back into his world.
Hagoone'
Reading Tony Hillerman's novels made me feel like I'd grown up there, that his words plugged into my kidlet memories and extrapolated them further somehow.
so go read The Blessing Way and don't stop til you get to The Shape Shifter,
because the world has lost another artist, another man with the deft touch that allowed us to smell and breathe and taste the world he created with words on paper, and the truest tribute for him is to fall back into his world.
Hagoone'
Monday, October 20, 2008
OH MAI GAWD.
So I'm in the middle of a Craig Ferguson Monologue binge on YouTube, and I read a link of "Craig Ferguson on Red Dwarf" I went...nah. I'd remember.
But yes. It is...as Lister's Confidence. wearing a yellow and black plaid jacket with a tropical shirt, slicked back hair, and lots of bling.
But yes. It is...as Lister's Confidence. wearing a yellow and black plaid jacket with a tropical shirt, slicked back hair, and lots of bling.
Sunday, October 19, 2008
et vårrull i nordens paris tromsø...
...running through Gimle.
Next time Lars and Dagmar are at Da Skog together, there will be copious insanity of the vårrull nature.
Watch This. here, I'll make it ridiculously easy.
I LOVE Craig Ferguson. Love Love Love.
Can't watch it now-right now-at this very moment? here are some of my favorite segments.
"Obama has said you can put lipstick on a pig but it's still a pig. And then Republicans are like *gasp* 'did you call Sarah Palin a pig?! That means you hate America!' And Democrats are saying 'No no no Republicans you, you don't love pigs, it's a pig's right to wear lipstick, it's- Free Shirley! it' Blah Blah BLAH BLAH BLEARGH *mimes vomiting."
"The candidates say 'well the family is off limits, you know, I mean.' it's like Sarah Palin says 'y'know my daughter's pregnancy- that's off limits, that's a family matter,' and Barack Obama sayin' 'yes, that's absolutely right.' but listen, here- here's what I say. if your families are off limits, why are they on the stage? why is it they're profiling in People magazine you and your damn family all over, the children marching around- shame on you, you manipulative hypocrite. I'm talking to both sides...I'm talking to all of you."
"Which candidate would you rather have dinner with? Here's an easy answer- none. They're politicians. I don't want dinner with you, I don't want your friendship, here's what I want to know. What are you gonna do for this country, pal, what are you gonna do?"
"Are we so lost we have to be sold our own democratic right?"
"If you don't vote, you're a moron...voting is not sexy, voting is not hip, it is not fashionable, it's not a movie, it's not a video game, all the kids ain't doin' it, frankly, voting is a pain in the ass; but here's a word, look it up- it is your duty to vote."
and the last 37 seconds should be seared into the brain of every citizen eligible to vote.
and trust me, don't read the 930 comments. if even the thought of leaving a comment along the lines of ...
"I prefer my right not to vote" or "show that you dont acknowledge this presidential race. DONT VOTE!!!" or "america is about freedom and about being free why should i as a proud patriotic free american have to go vote for somebody else? i'd rather watch football" or "personally, I feel that I'm so ill-informed by the media, that my vote (if I were to vote) would be so ill-informed that I'd vote for bugs bunny or something."
...crossed your mind, then read this comic, and then go back to basic Civics, and stay there until you've learned your lesson. pack a bag, it might be awhile.
too many of them and not enough of these guys:
"1) there are more than two people/parties running for presidency. It is not complicated to find someone close to your ideals. B) There are other important issues on the ballot."
(even though there's a number-letter list confusion there.)
or "There are plenty of third party candidates that you COULD vote for, and if none are to your liking, you're free to get involved in a grassroots party that suits you. Conspiracy theories, blaming everything on 'corporate elite' and mumbling about corruption and illusions is a COP OUT. Refusing to participate isn't going to change the status quo. You're just armchair-quarterbacking. You have to GET INVOLVED if the system is not to your liking."
And, because it's YouTube, of course there's...
"a tranny of one king is better than a democracy of a million kings" (really?)
And maybe it's just I read too much scifi in my formative years (hi, Orson Scott Card!), but...does anyone else get intergalactic despot-powered-spacesuit-sorta vibes from words like Theocrat and Neocon? where's the Decepticons?
"it's held together by greed, bitterness, and 18 versions of CSI. and, apparently, an inability to pay the power bill." (Craig's talking about CBS, but...)
gah. enough. make with the funny!
(hehehe).
Next time Lars and Dagmar are at Da Skog together, there will be copious insanity of the vårrull nature.
Watch This. here, I'll make it ridiculously easy.
I LOVE Craig Ferguson. Love Love Love.
Can't watch it now-right now-at this very moment? here are some of my favorite segments.
"Obama has said you can put lipstick on a pig but it's still a pig. And then Republicans are like *gasp* 'did you call Sarah Palin a pig?! That means you hate America!' And Democrats are saying 'No no no Republicans you, you don't love pigs, it's a pig's right to wear lipstick, it's- Free Shirley! it' Blah Blah BLAH BLAH BLEARGH *mimes vomiting."
"The candidates say 'well the family is off limits, you know, I mean.' it's like Sarah Palin says 'y'know my daughter's pregnancy- that's off limits, that's a family matter,' and Barack Obama sayin' 'yes, that's absolutely right.' but listen, here- here's what I say. if your families are off limits, why are they on the stage? why is it they're profiling in People magazine you and your damn family all over, the children marching around- shame on you, you manipulative hypocrite. I'm talking to both sides...I'm talking to all of you."
"Which candidate would you rather have dinner with? Here's an easy answer- none. They're politicians. I don't want dinner with you, I don't want your friendship, here's what I want to know. What are you gonna do for this country, pal, what are you gonna do?"
"Are we so lost we have to be sold our own democratic right?"
"If you don't vote, you're a moron...voting is not sexy, voting is not hip, it is not fashionable, it's not a movie, it's not a video game, all the kids ain't doin' it, frankly, voting is a pain in the ass; but here's a word, look it up- it is your duty to vote."
and the last 37 seconds should be seared into the brain of every citizen eligible to vote.
and trust me, don't read the 930 comments. if even the thought of leaving a comment along the lines of ...
"I prefer my right not to vote" or "show that you dont acknowledge this presidential race. DONT VOTE!!!" or "america is about freedom and about being free why should i as a proud patriotic free american have to go vote for somebody else? i'd rather watch football" or "personally, I feel that I'm so ill-informed by the media, that my vote (if I were to vote) would be so ill-informed that I'd vote for bugs bunny or something."
...crossed your mind, then read this comic, and then go back to basic Civics, and stay there until you've learned your lesson. pack a bag, it might be awhile.
too many of them and not enough of these guys:
"1) there are more than two people/parties running for presidency. It is not complicated to find someone close to your ideals. B) There are other important issues on the ballot."
(even though there's a number-letter list confusion there.)
or "There are plenty of third party candidates that you COULD vote for, and if none are to your liking, you're free to get involved in a grassroots party that suits you. Conspiracy theories, blaming everything on 'corporate elite' and mumbling about corruption and illusions is a COP OUT. Refusing to participate isn't going to change the status quo. You're just armchair-quarterbacking. You have to GET INVOLVED if the system is not to your liking."
And, because it's YouTube, of course there's...
"a tranny of one king is better than a democracy of a million kings" (really?)
And maybe it's just I read too much scifi in my formative years (hi, Orson Scott Card!), but...does anyone else get intergalactic despot-powered-spacesuit-sorta vibes from words like Theocrat and Neocon? where's the Decepticons?
"it's held together by greed, bitterness, and 18 versions of CSI. and, apparently, an inability to pay the power bill." (Craig's talking about CBS, but...)
gah. enough. make with the funny!
(hehehe).
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
She may look cute...
but trust me, it's a cunning facade meant to lure you to certain destruction. don't believe me? let me see if I can find the Cheerio picture from the Insta-booth thing at the museum. or the Spaghetti + Chopsticks Incident. or the ex-Pink Jumpsuit.
I ate a fig today! one of my figs! and it was only mostly ripe, but it looked so squishy and droopy I got scared for a moment that it was over-ripe and I would have missed out on The Figness so I poked at it and it fell off, which to my mind meant "ok, time to eat!"....shush.
Have even more tomatoes, albeit tiiiny wee little tomatolets, and even me, the resident hater of the red gooshy love-apples that aren't in the form of pizza sauce or salsa, likes them. Although whenever I eat one, my taste buds go "oo, tast...y...wait, that was a tomato. wasn't it?"
It's fun giving my taste buds existential dilemmas. (I really, really want to type existential dilemmae.)
I was talking to someone about how I lurve my phone, I just wish it were easier to browse the internet from it, especially since I don't ever use it until I'm wandering around increasingly seedier areas of El Cerrito/Richmond/Oakland/The City, with decreasing solar illumination, searching for a bead store/am-ba-lains service/LiveScan/fish store that eludes all skills I may possess with 411 or verizon navigator. They suggested I look at the iPod Touch, which apparently is like an iPhone without the phone bits. or like a very tiny computer that you can play music or video files on and use Teh Intarwebz, and has much of the functionality and look-I-can-see-the-screen of the iPhone. sounds intriguing, but essentially 300$ for 16 GB (or 240$ for 8 GB, which seems odd that twice the memory is only 60$) makes me cringe. I already have an mp3 player that I quite like, thank you, but...still...Teh Intarwebz is tantalizing. Although it was disappointing that I didn't have enough characters to engrave "passer, deliciae mea puella, quicum ludere, quem in sinu tenere*" on the back. (I could, however, engrave "amabo, mea dulcis Ipsitilla, mea deliciae, mei lepores**" ...ok, so i may have spent a bit of time on this. and yes, if I could have fit 'passer...tenere' the temptation would have been greater. ...shutup.)
as an aside, I'm pretty sure that, in the interest of honesty, 'talking' should be 'whining.'
also, LiveScan? CREEPY. Big Brother now has my digital 10-card, and now any employer using their service will know of any prior arrests AND any future arrests, from now until perpetuity or we all finally blow ourselves up in World War III or "oops, what was that button again?"
I feel like I should start hiding my laptop in my dresser and putting a grain of sand on the lid.
Yesterday was Fun With Not Having Any Fun At All, or how I learned to stop worrying and love inefficiency. the Alameda County Emergency Medical Services has a convenient list of LiveScan operators in the area. Great. I look up the one that seems best for me (right near Berkeley BART, which is on my way to the Alameda County Health Services building which is 'kitty corner from the San Leandro BART on the San Leandro side,' plus I can stop off for a coffee and a nummy sandwich from the little cafe and hit up the half price books for The Color Of Magic so I can finally start my participation in the Pratchganalong. anyway. back to the Day of Doom.)
For once, the 74 is on time, and I get on at precisely 1047.
This should have been my first clue that the day was Not Going To End Well.
I get to the Richmond BART and bart along my merry way to Berkeley, wander off to the LiveScan place, and am informed that their equipment was recalled and has not yet been returned to them. I recall seeing one on Telegraph close to where it becomes a one-way, so I pop into the Half Price Books, go "oh, right. this is the store with the 'need your Pratchett will pay top dollar' sign. drat." and head to coffee and sandwich, but the 1R is pulling up, so instead I forgo coffee and sandwich (this will prove to be A Bad Idea) in favor of getting on the bus. I get off at the Dwight & Telegraph stop, and scan storefronts for the LiveScan sign. no luck. must be further south, I think, so I start wandering.
When I get to the 9000s and Alta Bates, I decide to give up and call The Fount of Wisdom and Selfless Wielder of the Internet on Behalf of The Child, while walking into the Whole Foods Market for provisions and a potty break. (there are no public bathrooms in Berkeley. They're all 'broken'. Ok, there may exist public bathrooms in Berkeley, but trust me, they should probably be the subject of controlled demolition.) Mom directs me to 2512 Telegraph Avenue at the direction of the ACEMS website, and I walk back to where I started from, this time with my nummy orchard-fruit-and-black-tea smoothie and a bag of dark chocolate covered apricots in hand.
Scanning the storefronts, I see 2502 on the opposite side of Telegraph, and 2510 at the corner, so I back up one store and am greeted by...blank, barred-over windows and a sign saying "we've moved to 8355 Telegraph Avenue. Are. You. Serious. I was JUST THERE. no, really. JUST. THERE.
and so I revolt and walk to the secondhand bookstore on the opposite corner. They don't have any Pratchett either, but I pick up an ancient book of Cicero's legal defense speeches. ...shutup. so I'm a sucker for the smell of old books and dead languages. how can you not enjoy something where one line of latin results in eight of english? broken, painful english at that? not that it's english's fault that it's severely lacking in verb tenses and moods, but...I'm going to be quiet now.
it's the genes, people. the genes!
I walk to the bus. it's now nearly 1530 and I have to get to San Leandro by 1700. It discharges me at Russell, so I walk a block and enter the giant building with No Signage For Cal LiveScan (clue #22392362 for The Day of Doom). the LiveScan process itself is painless (but CREEPY), although I inform them that ACEMS has them still at 2512 Telegraph and they are surprised, since they moved september first. I am surprised when they tell me I can't pay with a check, despite the ACEMS website saying I could, but use my credit card. They give me a flier and a business card to give to the ACEMS when I get there.
By this time, it's 1545 and I'm close to Ashby BART so I walk the .5 mile or so and am greeted by A Giant Crater Teeming With Construction Equipment. Are You Serious, Oh My God, Really? part II. But it's still open, and I get on the Fremont bound train after 2 minutes.
I get to San Leandro BART at 1645. ok, 15 minutes to find the ACMS, no problem. kitty corner to BART on the san leandro side. makes sense now, because on the west side is freeway and the east side is city. kitty corner is a under-construction fountain and two hotel-looking buildings, and a sign for a bank. on the other corners are parking lot and Wendy's. I start walking north at the direction of the happy little voice of the Verizon Navigator, which tells me I've arrived at my destination on the right. I'm on a bridge, overlooking an overgrown ravine. (shades of Lake Country GPS Fail) I call the ACMS. 'oh, you see the wendy's? you see the big fountain? we're the second building that sort of looks like a hotel.'
oh, you mean the buildings with Absolutely No Signage Whatsover? those buildings? there's not even signage IN the damn building. luckily I look bedraggled enough and am close to the breaking point that some nice lady lets me in to the second floor offices (because it's now 3 past 1700, and they closed at 1700) and once she hears I'm from Richmond fetches someone to take my damn paperwork and my damn check and give me my damn California EMT certification, already.
Except that the website says that they accept personal checks, only that policy has changed, and the nice earnest young man tells me that he'll wait if I want to go get a cashier's check or a money order. ...at 1700. is a bank open? not in time for The Carless Wonder to get there. post offic-no. but despite all this, I apparently am allowed to, since I've Sold My Soul To Big Brother, mail in my paperwork. I do not cry. it's close, but I don't. I don't scream. it's close, but the people in the office have been so nice that I can restrain it. I go to the wendy's and get food because there has been No Food Since 1000. (I've forgotten about the apricots and the energy bar in the purse.)
I get home at almost 1940, because now that The Day of Doom is over, the 74 is back to its usual 'follow a schedule? what? what is this alien concept you speak of?'
so tomorrow (after a day of Hell No I Am Not Leaving The House) I shall bustle off to the postal services and mail off my stitchmarkers to my swap partner, get a money order, and mail my stupid paperwork to the stupid alameda county emergency medical services so they can give me my stupid certification so that I can get a stupid job and do even MORE paperwork so I can (probably) get a stupid commercial driver's license and a stupid state-physician physical.
stupid.
stupid stupid stupid.
Anyway. Because I've been whiny (and I didn't even get to what I originally sat down to talk about, which tells me a bit more than I thought) I give you...Hilarious Norwegian Sketch Comedy.
to set the tone: In Norwegian, the word for tree is "tre." its plural is "trær." the word for the cardinal number 3 is 'tre.'
The first line here is "hello and welcome to The News For Trees. The time is Tree (3)." and it degenerates from there.
then there's The News For Hair. (which is hår, which is pronounced very similarly to 'hore,' which means whore.)
or the Three Way Sketch.
There. some uplift for you.
well. uplift if you speak norwegian.
Ok, fine. uplifting for all y'all who don't: is this not the best picture ever? my cats do this all the time but I never have a camera to capture it. and by the time I come back, they've moved. I had written down somewhere where I found this picture, but I can't find it, and my attempt at retracing my steps has failed. if this is your picture, please let me know and I'll give you credit or take it down if that's what you'd like. but you should know that every time I see it, I smile and it makes my day a little better.
*o sparrow, the sweet little pet of my girl, with whom she plays, who she holds in her lap...
**I entreat you, my sweet Ipistrilla, my little pet, my dear...
(those are very rough translations. it's been awhile. especially for the second one. (that's Catullus 2 and Catullus 32, if you're curious. and no, I only entertained the thought of something from cicero briefly before realizing that I'd have to engrave it on the laptop, and even then, it wouldn't fit.)
I love Cary Grant.
especially at 1:32.
so go watch Bringing Up Baby.
it's amazing how fast they talk in this movie. whoa.
so go watch Bringing Up Baby.
it's amazing how fast they talk in this movie. whoa.
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
it's poetry in motion...
have you ever seen anything so pathetic?
right before I maneuvered the laptop to take the picture he was passed out, his head flopped back onto the window screen, both legs straight out against the sill.
pathetic.
right before I maneuvered the laptop to take the picture he was passed out, his head flopped back onto the window screen, both legs straight out against the sill. pathetic.
Monday, October 13, 2008
my fingers are...finging...
O NCIS, how I love thee.
So I get up this morning, get dressed, and head to the bus stop for to set my feet upon the first step towards the roundabout of curiousities so gently called 'getting my NREMT certification certified by Contra Costa County.' (another CCC!) (and if you had Tindall and Shi's book for American History, you just snorted milk (or whatever) out of your nose.)
The 74 is, as usual, late. someone has finally toppled the F and the 88 from 'worst AC transit bus EVAR' throne. but it comes, and I bounce along jollily to the Richmond BART station. using 511.org, I know that I need to take the 72 northbound, so I get on the bus.
it goes west. to Point Richmond. then travels back to the BART station I just left from, THEN goes east/north. oh well. an extra 30 minutes of knitting time, right? OH WAIT I left a needle at home. how? don't know. I blame the cat.
So I get off at the appropriate stop, and glance around. hm. problem. looks pretty damn residential. I wander, cursing the lack of cell phone (more on that later), and find an internet cafe.
I caffeinate. mmm, coffee. I sit at one of the computers when it opens up and revisit 511.org. only I've left the address at home, so I look it up online again. it looks slightly different. no matter. plug it in, make it go. the website takes forever, but it finally loads, and I see the squiggly little red line that tells me where I should go...and it ends in MARTINEZ. yeah.
Make a fist with just your thumbnail tucked in it. looking at the back of your hand, your thumb is the peninsula, home of the city (san francisco). right across from the bend of your thumb is Richmond. (not the thumb-crotch, that's San Jose.) Martinez is roughly where your middle finger's knuckle is.
yeah.
NAVIGATION FAIL.
I stare at the screen, contemplating all manner of unpleasant things, then ask to borrow the cafe's phone (no payphone, I think they've gone extinct.) I must look deranged enough that they smile nicely and say no problem and would I like a free refill on your mocha?
I call the office in the hopes that there's some sort of satellite office that I can bury myself in paperwork in and avoid the whole bus-bart-amtrak-bus-bus thing. (which really is bus-bart-amtrak-bus-bus-sub-sub-kartma-trab-sub). what do I get? a happy perky recorded message saying the office hours and that today is closed in observation of columbus day.
yeah. I hang up, accept refill, and retrace my steps to get home around 2:30.
DAY FAIL.
(did you know that in venezuela this holiday is called the day of indigenous resistance? can we do away with columbus day and have Indigenous People who were here before Leif who was here before Some Random Spanish Friar who was here before (maybe Zheng He who was here before) Columbus was here.)
and Thor Heyerdal beat them all. (see 1:46 (marco polo), 2:06 (leif-ur), and 3:19 (columbus) and what he says there?...not 'crap.' also 4:30 (roald), 5:37 (neil), 6:16 (lillehammer), and oh, just watch the whole thing. the subtitles are actually not that bad.)
Anyway. tomorrow I am NOT retracing my steps, because all I have to do to get to the Alameda County Emergency Medical Services office is to take the bus, then the bart, then walk across the street.
why norwegian winters are sometimes a scary, scary thing: the voiceover says "you've seen riverdance...you've seen stomp...now they're here, direct from broadway and west end, welcome the group...
...buttstomp.
Yeah. The Cat. The Cell Phone. The Mystery.
I'm hoping it's in the car, because it's not under the couch (which is where I found it last time) or under the cabinet (where I found it the time before last). tried calling it and it went directly to voicemail, bugger. so don't try to call me.
I'm not translating it, but it made me snicker and snort the remains of my mocha on the cat.
sorry Jayne.
oh, and there's more. but I'll leave that up to you.
So I get up this morning, get dressed, and head to the bus stop for to set my feet upon the first step towards the roundabout of curiousities so gently called 'getting my NREMT certification certified by Contra Costa County.' (another CCC!) (and if you had Tindall and Shi's book for American History, you just snorted milk (or whatever) out of your nose.)
The 74 is, as usual, late. someone has finally toppled the F and the 88 from 'worst AC transit bus EVAR' throne. but it comes, and I bounce along jollily to the Richmond BART station. using 511.org, I know that I need to take the 72 northbound, so I get on the bus.
it goes west. to Point Richmond. then travels back to the BART station I just left from, THEN goes east/north. oh well. an extra 30 minutes of knitting time, right? OH WAIT I left a needle at home. how? don't know. I blame the cat.
So I get off at the appropriate stop, and glance around. hm. problem. looks pretty damn residential. I wander, cursing the lack of cell phone (more on that later), and find an internet cafe.
I caffeinate. mmm, coffee. I sit at one of the computers when it opens up and revisit 511.org. only I've left the address at home, so I look it up online again. it looks slightly different. no matter. plug it in, make it go. the website takes forever, but it finally loads, and I see the squiggly little red line that tells me where I should go...and it ends in MARTINEZ. yeah.
Make a fist with just your thumbnail tucked in it. looking at the back of your hand, your thumb is the peninsula, home of the city (san francisco). right across from the bend of your thumb is Richmond. (not the thumb-crotch, that's San Jose.) Martinez is roughly where your middle finger's knuckle is.
yeah.
NAVIGATION FAIL.
I stare at the screen, contemplating all manner of unpleasant things, then ask to borrow the cafe's phone (no payphone, I think they've gone extinct.) I must look deranged enough that they smile nicely and say no problem and would I like a free refill on your mocha?
I call the office in the hopes that there's some sort of satellite office that I can bury myself in paperwork in and avoid the whole bus-bart-amtrak-bus-bus thing. (which really is bus-bart-amtrak-bus-bus-sub-sub-kartma-trab-sub). what do I get? a happy perky recorded message saying the office hours and that today is closed in observation of columbus day.
yeah. I hang up, accept refill, and retrace my steps to get home around 2:30.
DAY FAIL.
(did you know that in venezuela this holiday is called the day of indigenous resistance? can we do away with columbus day and have Indigenous People who were here before Leif who was here before Some Random Spanish Friar who was here before (maybe Zheng He who was here before) Columbus was here.)
and Thor Heyerdal beat them all. (see 1:46 (marco polo), 2:06 (leif-ur), and 3:19 (columbus) and what he says there?...not 'crap.' also 4:30 (roald), 5:37 (neil), 6:16 (lillehammer), and oh, just watch the whole thing. the subtitles are actually not that bad.)
Anyway. tomorrow I am NOT retracing my steps, because all I have to do to get to the Alameda County Emergency Medical Services office is to take the bus, then the bart, then walk across the street.
why norwegian winters are sometimes a scary, scary thing: the voiceover says "you've seen riverdance...you've seen stomp...now they're here, direct from broadway and west end, welcome the group...
...buttstomp.
Yeah. The Cat. The Cell Phone. The Mystery.
I'm hoping it's in the car, because it's not under the couch (which is where I found it last time) or under the cabinet (where I found it the time before last). tried calling it and it went directly to voicemail, bugger. so don't try to call me.
I'm not translating it, but it made me snicker and snort the remains of my mocha on the cat.
sorry Jayne.
oh, and there's more. but I'll leave that up to you.
Saturday, October 11, 2008
hail mary full of...shark?
parthenogenic sharks! whee!
this begs the question if someone's written a book about parthenojesus.
oh, I'm going to hell. at least I'll be in good company.
and I'll go happily as long as there's a DVD player, a TV, power for the same, and all the NCIS DVDs ever made.
The Kitten has been banished to my bathroom since his episode yesterday of leaving little brown pawprints all over The Boy's bathroom. he's mewling pitifully, but since The Boy caught him licking his soap, which apparently some cats just do for fun, hopefully with the banishment of the bar soap the leakage will cease. still hoping I don't hear from the vet that it's worms or some parasite, because soap is so much easier to fix. Raz is also upset because his playmate is banished- he'll go sit outside my door and paw at it, which sets the kitten off, which makes raz start with his I'm-a-dying-baby cry, which makes me start wondering when I'm going to get a phone call from my neighbours or child services, and have to explain...no...it's not a child...it's a furkid...
this begs the question if someone's written a book about parthenojesus.
oh, I'm going to hell. at least I'll be in good company.
and I'll go happily as long as there's a DVD player, a TV, power for the same, and all the NCIS DVDs ever made.
The Kitten has been banished to my bathroom since his episode yesterday of leaving little brown pawprints all over The Boy's bathroom. he's mewling pitifully, but since The Boy caught him licking his soap, which apparently some cats just do for fun, hopefully with the banishment of the bar soap the leakage will cease. still hoping I don't hear from the vet that it's worms or some parasite, because soap is so much easier to fix. Raz is also upset because his playmate is banished- he'll go sit outside my door and paw at it, which sets the kitten off, which makes raz start with his I'm-a-dying-baby cry, which makes me start wondering when I'm going to get a phone call from my neighbours or child services, and have to explain...no...it's not a child...it's a furkid...
Friday, October 10, 2008
Ok, ok, I get it.
I don't have genetic hypertension, so you, Universe, are intent on inducing it in me via improbable collusions of events.
well, Universe, Murphy, Anti-Karma... it ain't gonna work.
...ok. it might.
At least the cat is medicated now (even though my arms are slowly turning into swiss cheese...stupid cat you're supposed to like the flavor of the goo) and will with luck stop...leaking. even if he did decide to be sick at the worst possible time ever. like the garbage disposal picking a great time to need a $300 upgrade. gah.
Also, Landlords of the world: if you're gonna write a deposit return check, then a) spell the recipient's name right and b) make sure you've got funds to cover it.
Question to the ether: if you incur charges because your ex-landlord's check didn't go through, can you make your ex-landlord pay it? and doesn't a bank kinda have to tell you that a check for you hasn't cleared? and why does the cat keep attacking my laptop?
well, Universe, Murphy, Anti-Karma... it ain't gonna work.
...ok. it might.
At least the cat is medicated now (even though my arms are slowly turning into swiss cheese...stupid cat you're supposed to like the flavor of the goo) and will with luck stop...leaking. even if he did decide to be sick at the worst possible time ever. like the garbage disposal picking a great time to need a $300 upgrade. gah.
Also, Landlords of the world: if you're gonna write a deposit return check, then a) spell the recipient's name right and b) make sure you've got funds to cover it.
Question to the ether: if you incur charges because your ex-landlord's check didn't go through, can you make your ex-landlord pay it? and doesn't a bank kinda have to tell you that a check for you hasn't cleared? and why does the cat keep attacking my laptop?
Thursday, October 02, 2008
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
I can not has productivity.
so I go to print out my boarding pass, and what do I see?
it's like he knows...
off to mail package to firefly swappee. swapee? hope she likes it! I'll post a picture once I know they've received it.
Then laundry. Then fudz. Then (sigh) packing. time to crank the Dina. that is, if the cat gets off the laptop long enough for me to start iTunes.
first hit finding that? bli hos mig. swedish what?
next on the related videos? english?! whaaaaaat?!
oh god. brain. so. hurty. SO HURTY.
and for god's sakes. Let The 80's Die, People!
it's like he knows...
off to mail package to firefly swappee. swapee? hope she likes it! I'll post a picture once I know they've received it.
Then laundry. Then fudz. Then (sigh) packing. time to crank the Dina. that is, if the cat gets off the laptop long enough for me to start iTunes.
first hit finding that? bli hos mig. swedish what?
next on the related videos? english?! whaaaaaat?!
oh god. brain. so. hurty. SO HURTY.
and for god's sakes. Let The 80's Die, People!
Saturday, September 27, 2008
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Hello I wish to register A Complaint!
gaaaaaaaaah.
Stupid, Stupid, Stupid, STUPID California I hate you die.
Raziel hates me because I took him to the vet today. Jayne hates me because I took him to the vet today AND back to the shelter to get him microchipped since they were out when we adopted him. The city of El Cerrito hates me because I parked on a white curb.
just a white curb. no signage. the green curb on the opposite side was posted as a 30 minute parking zone, so I deliberately didn't park there since I wasn't sure how long I'd have to wait at the vet's with the kittehs. The curb by the corner was red, which is obvious no matter your state. so, me, I park where all evidence suggests that I am safe and happy.
what the hell does a white curb mean? a 3-min load/unload zone. NOWHERE in the CVC does it say that a white curb = 3 minutes. I couldn't find the elusive 'ecc' that my ticket cited. CDOT gave me nothing. CDMV gave me nothing but distance-from-the-curb and hill parking and 'obey posted signs' which is FUN when there aren't any.
where did I find something, anything stating that a white curb = 3 minutes? wikipedia. WIKIPEDIA. What. The. Fsmurmgggrrrfraghlmr.
and I know. Ignorantia juris non excusat. (although I think that's been bastardized by the legal system and that ignorantia legis neminem excusat is closer to what they mean when they say that ignorance of the law excuses none BUT that's the angry classicist talking. ((back in the box! back in the box!)) )
Stupid, Stupid, Stupid, STUPID California I hate you die.
Raziel hates me because I took him to the vet today. Jayne hates me because I took him to the vet today AND back to the shelter to get him microchipped since they were out when we adopted him. The city of El Cerrito hates me because I parked on a white curb.
just a white curb. no signage. the green curb on the opposite side was posted as a 30 minute parking zone, so I deliberately didn't park there since I wasn't sure how long I'd have to wait at the vet's with the kittehs. The curb by the corner was red, which is obvious no matter your state. so, me, I park where all evidence suggests that I am safe and happy.
what the hell does a white curb mean? a 3-min load/unload zone. NOWHERE in the CVC does it say that a white curb = 3 minutes. I couldn't find the elusive 'ecc' that my ticket cited. CDOT gave me nothing. CDMV gave me nothing but distance-from-the-curb and hill parking and 'obey posted signs' which is FUN when there aren't any.
where did I find something, anything stating that a white curb = 3 minutes? wikipedia. WIKIPEDIA. What. The. Fsmurmgggrrrfraghlmr.
and I know. Ignorantia juris non excusat. (although I think that's been bastardized by the legal system and that ignorantia legis neminem excusat is closer to what they mean when they say that ignorance of the law excuses none BUT that's the angry classicist talking. ((back in the box! back in the box!)) )
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
37 Uses for a Dead Sheep.
"I will not explain it, because then you will see the djinn in your dreams."
"Actually in this village I am a famous sheep murderer."
go watch "37 Uses for a Dead Sheep" because it's awesome. Turkish sounds like a great language to be a crotchety old man in. 09poop''''';;;;;;//;hgjkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk-,h
how on earth did the cat manage to spell poop? probably because that's all he does. ah, well.
although I did start watching based entirely on the fact that when I saw the title, I heard Lars-Trygve's voice in my head saying brightly "I saw a dead sheep!" in response to Marte's "I saw a gosling!" after The Great Sheep Caper.
"Actually in this village I am a famous sheep murderer."
go watch "37 Uses for a Dead Sheep" because it's awesome. Turkish sounds like a great language to be a crotchety old man in. 09poop''''';;;;;;//;hgjkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk-,h
how on earth did the cat manage to spell poop? probably because that's all he does. ah, well.
although I did start watching based entirely on the fact that when I saw the title, I heard Lars-Trygve's voice in my head saying brightly "I saw a dead sheep!" in response to Marte's "I saw a gosling!" after The Great Sheep Caper.
oh dear god.
please, by all that is holy and right and wonderful in this world, please let it be so that this woman needed several takes to make it through this video without cracking up. please.
otherwise, I'm going to cry. and move to my happy little island of sanity.
otherwise, I'm going to cry. and move to my happy little island of sanity.
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
I can has certification!
huzzah. now I just have to get certified by the Grand State of California. oh, joy, more paperwork. curse you, wheels of bureaucracy!
anyway. gratuitous cuteness:
Raziel's about two seconds away from flipping out and escaping the clutches of The Boy.
anyway. gratuitous cuteness:
Raziel's about two seconds away from flipping out and escaping the clutches of The Boy.
Monday, September 15, 2008
uh-huh...
So according to MyHeritage.com's celebrity photo matching thing, I look the most like Rogue.
or three of the popular K-pop stars. or Zhang Ziye. or a J-pop star/actress.
...now I'm not saying you're not going to find some entertaining fragments buried in my genetic code that don't come from Norway or Germany (Hello, Northern/Eastern Europe!), but I'm pretty sure that mongoloid isn't going to be applied to my skull in the far future. (Hello, futuristic Temperence Brennen! ...wait, that means I died a horrible death and ended up somewhere strange. ok, let's back up. um....Hello, Temperence Brennen working on cataloging a old cemetary full of peacefully-dead folks!)
Anyway. no matter the photo, there will be at least 3, more likely 5, of 10 lookalikes that are asian. is it like that for everyone? I don't know.
I'm off to make my SALMON ONIGIRI OMGYAY*, grab my knitting (shawl of doom will die), and head to BART to muni to muni to the building where I get to fork over $90 to take a stupid computer based exam. boo NREMT. boo.
*I have been listening to my lecture notes for the past 3 days. oh. mai. gawd. I think my brain is fssszzzzzt. so you can just deal with the outbreak of intarwebz.
or three of the popular K-pop stars. or Zhang Ziye. or a J-pop star/actress.
...now I'm not saying you're not going to find some entertaining fragments buried in my genetic code that don't come from Norway or Germany (Hello, Northern/Eastern Europe!), but I'm pretty sure that mongoloid isn't going to be applied to my skull in the far future. (Hello, futuristic Temperence Brennen! ...wait, that means I died a horrible death and ended up somewhere strange. ok, let's back up. um....Hello, Temperence Brennen working on cataloging a old cemetary full of peacefully-dead folks!)
Anyway. no matter the photo, there will be at least 3, more likely 5, of 10 lookalikes that are asian. is it like that for everyone? I don't know.
I'm off to make my SALMON ONIGIRI OMGYAY*, grab my knitting (shawl of doom will die), and head to BART to muni to muni to the building where I get to fork over $90 to take a stupid computer based exam. boo NREMT. boo.
*I have been listening to my lecture notes for the past 3 days. oh. mai. gawd. I think my brain is fssszzzzzt. so you can just deal with the outbreak of intarwebz.
Thursday, September 11, 2008
finally!
I was searching for this for Lars and about to give up when Re-SULT!
and now it's going on the blog, so I can find the damn thing again.
and now it's going on the blog, so I can find the damn thing again.
I knew there was a reason.
Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are dead.
I have long held that this movie is, in fact, fantastic, so I was most pleased when I flicked on the TV for more paper sorting, sighed when I realized that it was a Burn Notice marathon and not an NCIS marathon, decided to see if there was a Clean House on (I love me my Niecy! even though she drives The Boy insaaaaane), and happened to pop into R&G on my way down the channel list.
Just in time for the wind.
and as I was watching, I went...that...looks...like Gary Oldman. can't be. I'd know. check info. gasp. it is. flippin' sweet.
I have long held that this movie is, in fact, fantastic, so I was most pleased when I flicked on the TV for more paper sorting, sighed when I realized that it was a Burn Notice marathon and not an NCIS marathon, decided to see if there was a Clean House on (I love me my Niecy! even though she drives The Boy insaaaaane), and happened to pop into R&G on my way down the channel list.
Just in time for the wind.
and as I was watching, I went...that...looks...like Gary Oldman. can't be. I'd know. check info. gasp. it is. flippin' sweet.
Tuesday, September 09, 2008
boom de yada
I know, I know, the cheesiest commercial known to man. but still. how can you not love this?
water-bears in spaaaaaaace!
not only that- zombie water-bears in spaaaaace!
although the evil part of my brain is going "where's PETA now, hm? who cares about the TORTURES being inflicted on countless innocent waterbears, huh? HUH?" but it is being hustled back to its cynicave by the more rational parts of the brain, which are going "shutup! are you nuts? you want them to go even crazier? back in the cave! now! don't make me get the superego..."
anyway, back to the shiny.
from the great XKCD. who I recently discovered has alttext tags on all his comics, which meant I had to go aaaaall the way back through the archive. not that it was that painful. twist my arm. and youtube almost always comes through-
et:
aliumque:
but the best:
Friday, September 05, 2008
O Causa Petus!
(that's Oh for Pete's Sake, for all y'all non-classicists. dvs, everyone who isn't Mom, since I don't think grandma and grandpa read this. hi, Mom.)
But seriously folks. Why is it that you can find all manner of freaked out people ranting and raving and quoting and fearmongering about pinko commie plots against us, the Good People of America The Brave, involving that sweet bane of our existence, Fluoride, and the aforementioned Terror of The Deep, Dark Doctor's Office, Vaccinations.
oh god, oh god, we're all gonna die.
Except that we ARE, because nowhere can I find the masses mobilized against the overproliferation of antibiotics. note that I mention 'masses,' because there's plenty of info out there, but I'm talking about your stereotypical, internet-forum poster with lots of pretty links and well-written (and horribly written) vitriol.
(please note that each of the links above will lead you to a shiny website of www. insert-topic-here debate.com. someone's paying for that domain.)
and yes, this website's fairly shiny. but they're about all manner of things, like bovine growth hormone, global climate change, etc, and this is just one small subset of the massive website.
google 'antibiotic debate' and pretty much all the top articles are of the 'feeding antibiotics to livestock' variety. "antibiotic overproliferation" gets you...a sudden jump in really big words that are by no means friendly to the general public. (do it with 'antibiotic overperfusion' and you need a medical degree. sheesh.) "antibiotic terror" gives you everything you want to know about Anthrax. But take note of the third link down. yes, still about Terror (Fear! Fear! Fear!). but what specifically?
MRSA.
your four letter word for "oh my god we're all gonna die and this time I'm serious, man."
Multi-Resistant Staphylococcus Aureus. Think it's hyperbole? they're still crunching numbers, (and yes, I know, stats are stats are stats and you only trust them as much as you can throw them), but it's very likely that in 2007 more people died from MRSA than did from AIDS around the world. it can lead to sepsis (mmm, bacteria in your blood! yummy!), TSS, and necrotizing pneumonia. (...ew.)
You don't need antibacterial hand soap. OCD? get an alcohol wipe. kills the bacteria AND the viruses, not to mention your beneficial skin bacteria. oh, well. Antibacterial Body Wash! Antibacterial window cleaner! Antibacterial spray and wipes for your door handles and kid's toys! Antibacterial laundry detergent! Antibacterial Kleenex and Toilet Paper. (you laugh. I've seen it.)
soap. and. water. go ahead, add a capful of bleach to your mop bucket or some vinegar to your spraybottle if your skin is getting that skitchy feeling after Billy's friend Joe has been wiping his snot all over the walls of your house and toys and the cat and you. raw chicken goo on the counter? soap. water. lemon juice will make it smell nice. and Billy can drink it without side effects other than an unhappy digestive system.
let's save the antibacterial soaps and sprays for industrial use, hm? like BART bathrooms, because....ew. and hospitals, although even there, the little squeegy things near almost every entrance and exit? alcohol based.
on the other hand, this cracks me up and gives me hope. (I have quite possibly been reading too much Mark Morford.) you thought you'd seen every peripheral possible for an iPod? you thought wrong. Hi Larry Ass. (thanks, scott, for a wonderful turn of phrase.)
on the other other hand, what is it that makes me unable to post a reply when it's obvious that I am never going to influence the debate?lkjh;lukjkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkj988b and why does Jayne insist on adding his unintelligible 2 cents to everything?
But seriously folks. Why is it that you can find all manner of freaked out people ranting and raving and quoting and fearmongering about pinko commie plots against us, the Good People of America The Brave, involving that sweet bane of our existence, Fluoride, and the aforementioned Terror of The Deep, Dark Doctor's Office, Vaccinations.
oh god, oh god, we're all gonna die.
Except that we ARE, because nowhere can I find the masses mobilized against the overproliferation of antibiotics. note that I mention 'masses,' because there's plenty of info out there, but I'm talking about your stereotypical, internet-forum poster with lots of pretty links and well-written (and horribly written) vitriol.
(please note that each of the links above will lead you to a shiny website of www. insert-topic-here debate.com. someone's paying for that domain.)
and yes, this website's fairly shiny. but they're about all manner of things, like bovine growth hormone, global climate change, etc, and this is just one small subset of the massive website.
google 'antibiotic debate' and pretty much all the top articles are of the 'feeding antibiotics to livestock' variety. "antibiotic overproliferation" gets you...a sudden jump in really big words that are by no means friendly to the general public. (do it with 'antibiotic overperfusion' and you need a medical degree. sheesh.) "antibiotic terror" gives you everything you want to know about Anthrax. But take note of the third link down. yes, still about Terror (Fear! Fear! Fear!). but what specifically?
MRSA.
your four letter word for "oh my god we're all gonna die and this time I'm serious, man."
Multi-Resistant Staphylococcus Aureus. Think it's hyperbole? they're still crunching numbers, (and yes, I know, stats are stats are stats and you only trust them as much as you can throw them), but it's very likely that in 2007 more people died from MRSA than did from AIDS around the world. it can lead to sepsis (mmm, bacteria in your blood! yummy!), TSS, and necrotizing pneumonia. (...ew.)
You don't need antibacterial hand soap. OCD? get an alcohol wipe. kills the bacteria AND the viruses, not to mention your beneficial skin bacteria. oh, well. Antibacterial Body Wash! Antibacterial window cleaner! Antibacterial spray and wipes for your door handles and kid's toys! Antibacterial laundry detergent! Antibacterial Kleenex and Toilet Paper. (you laugh. I've seen it.)
soap. and. water. go ahead, add a capful of bleach to your mop bucket or some vinegar to your spraybottle if your skin is getting that skitchy feeling after Billy's friend Joe has been wiping his snot all over the walls of your house and toys and the cat and you. raw chicken goo on the counter? soap. water. lemon juice will make it smell nice. and Billy can drink it without side effects other than an unhappy digestive system.
let's save the antibacterial soaps and sprays for industrial use, hm? like BART bathrooms, because....ew. and hospitals, although even there, the little squeegy things near almost every entrance and exit? alcohol based.
on the other hand, this cracks me up and gives me hope. (I have quite possibly been reading too much Mark Morford.) you thought you'd seen every peripheral possible for an iPod? you thought wrong. Hi Larry Ass. (thanks, scott, for a wonderful turn of phrase.)
on the other other hand, what is it that makes me unable to post a reply when it's obvious that I am never going to influence the debate?lkjh;lukjkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkj988b and why does Jayne insist on adding his unintelligible 2 cents to everything?
Thursday, September 04, 2008
Tuesday, September 02, 2008
the agony of indecision...
I just took a quiz where I was prompted to choose what I'd indulge in if I wanted to get myself a treat. the second option down was "a new book" and I mentally said "aha, perfect."
then I kept reading, and the second from the bottom was "some art supplies."
I may have said an indelicate word.
choosing the first, I was given this response:
taking the second option, I got this:
Neither one is a piercing that appeals to me, but hey, random meaningless quizzes are what the internet was meant for, right? *cough*
the wheels of bureaucracy turn slowly, but they finally turned enough to let the NREMT agree to let me test! whee! tomorrow I get to call whoever it is I need to call and find a test center and date.
also, thanks to more waiting for jam-to-become-jam-and-not-really hot fruit juice, I have discovered that: (not going to link all these, because some of them aren't very entertaining, but you, too, can lose time to blogthings, should you desire.)
I am "76% Obama, 24% McCain" (but not likely, because it was a two-option thing, and we all know how much I love those.)
my travel profile was disappointing; I was hoping for a quiz, not a "check off the cities you've been to and we'll calculate a percentage" (hello, people...there are more than 15 cities in europe.)
I belong in the UK. (although the quiz title was "what english speaking country are you")
I am Very Worldly.
I am a Natural Beauty (read: too lazy to wear makeup and fight with hair)
I am 48% democrat, and 20 % republican. (I guess the other 32 % is off with arbeiderpartiet.)
I am a Moderate Mama (other alternatives were Liberal Lady and Conservative Chick) (this one's pretty dead on, so far.)
I am Chinese Food.
I should Play The Harp. (because apparently my dominant personality characteristic is my 'zen-ness' and my secondary personality characteristic is my 'quiet independence')
I am more like Angelina Jolie (than Jennifer Aniston)
My psyche is Yellow.
I am Macaroni and Cheese.
I should learn French.
I am 60% Normal.
my 80's Theme song is Living on a Prayer by Grambonjovi. er. Bon Jovi.
I should be a Cherry Redhead.
My beauty element is Earth.
I am a Classic Martini (which means that my drinking soulmates are the Chocolate Martini people and my drinking rivals are Margarita Martini people, which begs the question...what the hell is a margarita martini?)
I need some Black in my life (which I do believe contrasts rather glaringly with the whole Yellow psyche thing.)...but if I change my last answer, I need some Green in my life.
My Dosha is Kapha (but I trust Randi more than any internet meme)
My power bird is a Vulture.
I am a Light Pink Rose (thus, I represent sweetness and grace. please don't die laughing.)
My boobies' names are Mork and Mindy. (well, they are now.)
I like names that are Retro and Fashionable.
My Geek Profile shows high Academic Geekiness and moderate Music, Scifi, and Geekiness in Love.
I am a Blue Girl, and my Inner Color is Blue.
I am 78% Tortured Genius, and I could pass 8th grade science.
I am best described by the paintig San Giorgio Maggiore, Twilight by Claude Monet
I am the Tango.
My inner muse is Euterpe. (that's music, for those of you non-classicists.)
Alfred Gockel should paint my portrait.
My name is Marshmallow Angel Rockstar Itchylips Teddybear Flawless Raspberrylips Easy Yummybear Angeleyes.
My Scandinavian Name is Halle Kirby. (kirby? what?)
My Inner Blood Type is B. (inner blood type. wow.)
Lucy Lawless is my Celebrity Boob Twin.
I have a Melancholic Temperament.
I should honeymoon in Mexico. (nah.)
I am an Auditory Learner.
If I were a goddess, I'd be Psyche.
My aura is Blue. (other blues are Angelina Jolie, the Dali [sic] Lama, and Oprah, and I should be a Psychic, Peace Corps Volunteer, or Counselor.) What would a Dali Lama be? and can I be present for the conversation between the Dali Lama and the Dalai Lama? (Dalai Lama: Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own- Dali Lama: FISH!)
I am 48% Misanthropic.
and lastly, if I were an art movement, I'd be Romanticism.
then I kept reading, and the second from the bottom was "some art supplies."
I may have said an indelicate word.
choosing the first, I was given this response:
You Are a Lip Piercing |
 You are rebellious and defiant. You resist conforming and following rules. You're the type to get pierced anywhere you want, and you're not taking your piercings out for anyone! Reflective and philosophical, you've spent a lot of time thinking about how you'd like to live your life. And it just so happens that your preferred lifestyle is pretty far outside the mainstream. While people may find you standoffish, you aren't necessarily rude, mean, or judgmental. You just don't try to fit in. And that's enough to scare most people away! |
taking the second option, I got this:
You Are an Eyebrow Piercing |
 You are unique, quirky, and more than a little eccentric. You cultivate the weirder sides of your personality, and you don't mind sharing them. Ever since you were a kid, you've had strong opinions. You've never been like everyone else, and you're okay with that. And you've always been able to tell people exactly what you think - even when they don't want to hear it. You love to create, dream, imagine, and communicate. You live in your own universe. And unlike most people who live in their own little world, you're happy to invite anyone in! |
Neither one is a piercing that appeals to me, but hey, random meaningless quizzes are what the internet was meant for, right? *cough*
the wheels of bureaucracy turn slowly, but they finally turned enough to let the NREMT agree to let me test! whee! tomorrow I get to call whoever it is I need to call and find a test center and date.
also, thanks to more waiting for jam-to-become-jam-and-not-really hot fruit juice, I have discovered that: (not going to link all these, because some of them aren't very entertaining, but you, too, can lose time to blogthings, should you desire.)
I am "76% Obama, 24% McCain" (but not likely, because it was a two-option thing, and we all know how much I love those.)
my travel profile was disappointing; I was hoping for a quiz, not a "check off the cities you've been to and we'll calculate a percentage" (hello, people...there are more than 15 cities in europe.)
I belong in the UK. (although the quiz title was "what english speaking country are you")
I am Very Worldly.
I am a Natural Beauty (read: too lazy to wear makeup and fight with hair)
I am 48% democrat, and 20 % republican. (I guess the other 32 % is off with arbeiderpartiet.)
I am a Moderate Mama (other alternatives were Liberal Lady and Conservative Chick) (this one's pretty dead on, so far.)
I am Chinese Food.
I should Play The Harp. (because apparently my dominant personality characteristic is my 'zen-ness' and my secondary personality characteristic is my 'quiet independence')
I am more like Angelina Jolie (than Jennifer Aniston)
My psyche is Yellow.
I am Macaroni and Cheese.
I should learn French.
I am 60% Normal.
my 80's Theme song is Living on a Prayer by Grambonjovi. er. Bon Jovi.
I should be a Cherry Redhead.
My beauty element is Earth.
I am a Classic Martini (which means that my drinking soulmates are the Chocolate Martini people and my drinking rivals are Margarita Martini people, which begs the question...what the hell is a margarita martini?)
I need some Black in my life (which I do believe contrasts rather glaringly with the whole Yellow psyche thing.)...but if I change my last answer, I need some Green in my life.
My Dosha is Kapha (but I trust Randi more than any internet meme)
My power bird is a Vulture.
I am a Light Pink Rose (thus, I represent sweetness and grace. please don't die laughing.)
My boobies' names are Mork and Mindy. (well, they are now.)
I like names that are Retro and Fashionable.
My Geek Profile shows high Academic Geekiness and moderate Music, Scifi, and Geekiness in Love.
I am a Blue Girl, and my Inner Color is Blue.
I am 78% Tortured Genius, and I could pass 8th grade science.
I am best described by the paintig San Giorgio Maggiore, Twilight by Claude Monet
I am the Tango.
My inner muse is Euterpe. (that's music, for those of you non-classicists.)
Alfred Gockel should paint my portrait.
My name is Marshmallow Angel Rockstar Itchylips Teddybear Flawless Raspberrylips Easy Yummybear Angeleyes.
My Scandinavian Name is Halle Kirby. (kirby? what?)
My Inner Blood Type is B. (inner blood type. wow.)
Lucy Lawless is my Celebrity Boob Twin.
I have a Melancholic Temperament.
I should honeymoon in Mexico. (nah.)
I am an Auditory Learner.
If I were a goddess, I'd be Psyche.
My aura is Blue. (other blues are Angelina Jolie, the Dali [sic] Lama, and Oprah, and I should be a Psychic, Peace Corps Volunteer, or Counselor.) What would a Dali Lama be? and can I be present for the conversation between the Dali Lama and the Dalai Lama? (Dalai Lama: Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own- Dali Lama: FISH!)
I am 48% Misanthropic.
and lastly, if I were an art movement, I'd be Romanticism.
Friday, August 29, 2008
sometimes I despair...
People. Vaccinate your kids.
lemme say it again. Vaccinate. your. kids.
for god's sake- I thought I'd heard the worst possible pseudoscience-informing-policy bullshit, but nope.
don't read the comments. it's bad for your blood pressure.
don't believe me? someone stated that antibodies aren't around anymore because of vaccines, and that's why we're seeing measles etc etc outbreaks.
um.
um.
um.
the whole point of vaccines is that you create antibodies in response to it! Edward Jenner is spinning in his grave enough to power the entire eastern seaboard.
if you can't vaccinate your kid because of autoimmune issues or the like, then fine! be glad that (hopefully) most of the kids your kid will encounter won't be likely to pass along an illness to your kid. if you don't want to vaccinate your kid, then don't bitch when you get kicked out of day care, school, play group, or whatever. if you have the freedom to do something, you have the freedom to experience the consequences. deal. with. it. if you can't vaccinate your kid because you can't afford it, then let's organize a takeover and go hold the government hostage until they put in some USEFUL healthcare, like, say, total coverage until the age of 18, free.
(hi, homeland security! yes, I did just use the words 'hostage' and 'govenment' in the same sentence. oops! did it again! neener neener neener.)
lemme say it again. Vaccinate. your. kids.
for god's sake- I thought I'd heard the worst possible pseudoscience-informing-policy bullshit, but nope.
don't read the comments. it's bad for your blood pressure.
don't believe me? someone stated that antibodies aren't around anymore because of vaccines, and that's why we're seeing measles etc etc outbreaks.
um.
um.
um.
the whole point of vaccines is that you create antibodies in response to it! Edward Jenner is spinning in his grave enough to power the entire eastern seaboard.
if you can't vaccinate your kid because of autoimmune issues or the like, then fine! be glad that (hopefully) most of the kids your kid will encounter won't be likely to pass along an illness to your kid. if you don't want to vaccinate your kid, then don't bitch when you get kicked out of day care, school, play group, or whatever. if you have the freedom to do something, you have the freedom to experience the consequences. deal. with. it. if you can't vaccinate your kid because you can't afford it, then let's organize a takeover and go hold the government hostage until they put in some USEFUL healthcare, like, say, total coverage until the age of 18, free.
(hi, homeland security! yes, I did just use the words 'hostage' and 'govenment' in the same sentence. oops! did it again! neener neener neener.)
Monday, August 25, 2008
hee.
the pertinent part of this little clip is the quote at 0:55.
tomorrow between 1400 and 1800 we get to pick up our new kitteh. he is little and fluffy and stripèd and cute. the woman at the animal shelter saw us playing with his buddy, who kept trying to escape, and when we said we were interested in adopting not him, but his buddy, she went "oh! but..." and I said that since the other little cutie was so outgoing, he would certainly win someone over quickly, and that we'd had experience with a shy fluffball. (and in my brain I said "and the one we want is preeeeetty.)
tomorrow between 1400 and 1800 we get to pick up our new kitteh. he is little and fluffy and stripèd and cute. the woman at the animal shelter saw us playing with his buddy, who kept trying to escape, and when we said we were interested in adopting not him, but his buddy, she went "oh! but..." and I said that since the other little cutie was so outgoing, he would certainly win someone over quickly, and that we'd had experience with a shy fluffball. (and in my brain I said "and the one we want is preeeeetty.)
Sunday, August 24, 2008
time moves too slowly....
February 2009.
Dana Stabenow is deliberately torturing me.
April 2009.
So is Jim Butcher.
February AND April, 2009.
Carrie Vaughn is evil for making me wait so long but sainted for getting two books out in one year.
Unknown, 2009.
S.L. Viehl has a new Stardoc coming out.
I do hate it when authors kill off their main characters. still. She hasn't pissed me off as much as Jennifer Roberson did, so I'll keep looking forward to her books. (that sounds terribly...I dunno. snotty? I know full well that sometimes the characters don't do what you want them to do, and that the authors in question are not writing their books for my personal pleasure. It's just...I liked Cherijo, not memory-wiped-weird-not-cherijo-Jarn. I don't quite 'get' her. Maybe the next book will make me better like her.)
October 2008.
Mercedes Lackey still loves me.
Apparently Mercedes Lackey's dream cast for some of her characters includes Sting as Firesong and David Bowie as Falconsbane.
Vanyel? Johnny Depp.
Oh yeah. I'd go see that movie. well. those movies.
About as fast as I'd go see Johnny Depp as Crowley in Good Omens.
November 2008.
Laurell K Hamilton's next Meredith Gentry book is out. Hopefully this series won't follow the same path as the Anita Blake series.
June 2008.
WHAT. lies! I haven't seen Shadows Return anywhere! Lynn Flewelling, there's a gummint consp'rrcy keeping me from your goodness!
ahem. er. anyway. there's also a new one in the summer of 2009.
Jacqueline Carey has a ton of new books out, but it's been too long since I read her first series and as I recall, they were ...dense. in a good way. but still. not easily picked up and put down, like...say...on BART. or AC transit.
Spring 2009?
More Mary Russell from Laurie R King?
we can but hope.
Dana Stabenow is deliberately torturing me.
April 2009.
So is Jim Butcher.
February AND April, 2009.
Carrie Vaughn is evil for making me wait so long but sainted for getting two books out in one year.
Unknown, 2009.
S.L. Viehl has a new Stardoc coming out.
I do hate it when authors kill off their main characters. still. She hasn't pissed me off as much as Jennifer Roberson did, so I'll keep looking forward to her books. (that sounds terribly...I dunno. snotty? I know full well that sometimes the characters don't do what you want them to do, and that the authors in question are not writing their books for my personal pleasure. It's just...I liked Cherijo, not memory-wiped-weird-not-cherijo-Jarn. I don't quite 'get' her. Maybe the next book will make me better like her.)
October 2008.
Mercedes Lackey still loves me.
Apparently Mercedes Lackey's dream cast for some of her characters includes Sting as Firesong and David Bowie as Falconsbane.
Vanyel? Johnny Depp.
Oh yeah. I'd go see that movie. well. those movies.
About as fast as I'd go see Johnny Depp as Crowley in Good Omens.
November 2008.
Laurell K Hamilton's next Meredith Gentry book is out. Hopefully this series won't follow the same path as the Anita Blake series.
June 2008.
WHAT. lies! I haven't seen Shadows Return anywhere! Lynn Flewelling, there's a gummint consp'rrcy keeping me from your goodness!
ahem. er. anyway. there's also a new one in the summer of 2009.
Jacqueline Carey has a ton of new books out, but it's been too long since I read her first series and as I recall, they were ...dense. in a good way. but still. not easily picked up and put down, like...say...on BART. or AC transit.
Spring 2009?
More Mary Russell from Laurie R King?
we can but hope.
grrrr.
Ok. Blogger is officially pissing me off now. why does one line- four words- of non transliterated hebrew make my layout go all manner of wonky? sigh. Unfortunately, it's hit my stubborn button, so I will win. even if it kills me.
Here's the thingie from kateswiegehts. again.
yadda yadda use random music player, boo stupid format restrictions, first line of each song, I hate blogger, friends guess, yadda update when they guess right.
stupid blogger.
1. Open your eyes undo the seem
2. If you wanna hang out you've got to take her out.
3. La lune, trop blanc,
4. It begins to tell
5. Well I'm getting up now
6. She's got her halo and wings
7. Det er meldt regn så til de grader
8. They told him don't you ever come around here
9. Just a little bit stronger
10. Halleluja! Halleluja! Halleluja! (again. mom's the only one getting this one.)
11. I think we need an agent
12. She's alright but sometimes she's so wrong
13. DJ please
14. The mama pajama rolled out of bed
15. Parkeringsvakt vær fornuftig nå
16. Hot hot hot sweat sweet
17. Mai-ia-hii mai-ia-huu mai-ia-ha mai-ia-haha (the 'numa song' ain't gonna cut it.)
18. Stars are out tonight
19. Youth culture
20. Od yavo' shalom aleinu (I HATE YOU BLOGGER.)
21. Vi- vi kunne fly
22. Oh Maria Maria
23. How can the small flowers grow if the wild winds blow and the cold now is all around
24. Wandering child so lost so helpless
25. Take away the sensation inside
26. Hei lå li lå lå lå lå lååååå lå lå lå lå lååå lå lå lå lå leeei lå (um....good luck.)
27. Fox in the snow
28. Pardon me while I burst
29. Gloria nomeus jesu'kristo
30. This ain't a song for the broken hearted
stupid meme not allowing the true version of this 30 song thing cause I can't represent lyricless songs. like THE BEST SONG EVER. but I can't find it online and I'm too lazy to (or not annoyed enough) to faithfully recreate the previous post. go buy this. right now.
# 30 is for Grambo. OF course.
Here's the thingie from kateswiegehts. again.
yadda yadda use random music player, boo stupid format restrictions, first line of each song, I hate blogger, friends guess, yadda update when they guess right.
stupid blogger.
1. Open your eyes undo the seem
2. If you wanna hang out you've got to take her out.
3. La lune, trop blanc,
4. It begins to tell
5. Well I'm getting up now
6. She's got her halo and wings
7. Det er meldt regn så til de grader
8. They told him don't you ever come around here
9. Just a little bit stronger
10. Halleluja! Halleluja! Halleluja! (again. mom's the only one getting this one.)
11. I think we need an agent
12. She's alright but sometimes she's so wrong
13. DJ please
14. The mama pajama rolled out of bed
15. Parkeringsvakt vær fornuftig nå
16. Hot hot hot sweat sweet
17. Mai-ia-hii mai-ia-huu mai-ia-ha mai-ia-haha (the 'numa song' ain't gonna cut it.)
18. Stars are out tonight
19. Youth culture
20. Od yavo' shalom aleinu (I HATE YOU BLOGGER.)
21. Vi- vi kunne fly
22. Oh Maria Maria
23. How can the small flowers grow if the wild winds blow and the cold now is all around
24. Wandering child so lost so helpless
25. Take away the sensation inside
26. Hei lå li lå lå lå lå lååååå lå lå lå lå lååå lå lå lå lå leeei lå (um....good luck.)
27. Fox in the snow
28. Pardon me while I burst
29. Gloria nomeus jesu'kristo
30. This ain't a song for the broken hearted
stupid meme not allowing the true version of this 30 song thing cause I can't represent lyricless songs. like THE BEST SONG EVER. but I can't find it online and I'm too lazy to (or not annoyed enough) to faithfully recreate the previous post. go buy this. right now.
# 30 is for Grambo. OF course.
blooogger....
I think I broke the blog. At least the formatting thereof. I took away the hebrew! what's the deal, bloggie me boy?
I planted the figs today! finally. the wild turkey fig has three little figlets, the panache...has lots of pretty green leaves. here's hoping that it's not one of the wasp-pollinated figs, cause otherwise...no figs for me.
the passionflower has its own pretty pot AND trellis, so it's no longer grasping for anything like legs, bikes, other plants, the grill...trust me, it was the Plant of Doom.
I discovered the Fine Living Network runs the original japanese Iron Chef. it is awesome.
unless you discover this during Battle Cuttlefish.
ew.
I planted the figs today! finally. the wild turkey fig has three little figlets, the panache...has lots of pretty green leaves. here's hoping that it's not one of the wasp-pollinated figs, cause otherwise...no figs for me.
the passionflower has its own pretty pot AND trellis, so it's no longer grasping for anything like legs, bikes, other plants, the grill...trust me, it was the Plant of Doom.
I discovered the Fine Living Network runs the original japanese Iron Chef. it is awesome.
unless you discover this during Battle Cuttlefish.
ew.
Friday, August 22, 2008
yeah, right, bracing, uh-huh.
Bracing For Inflation. ....bracing? really? Let's look at what we were paying for gas a few months ago: 5.10. 5.10!
Five-teeen, fiveten! *cue Grosse Point Blank "ten...years! ten years! quote...go*
a little late, guys.
but. but. but. he. ehehe. ehehehehe.
so I was trying to find a clip on youtube of the aforementioned "ten...years! ten years!" quote, since I'm sure no one but my mother is going to understand it, but found this instead.
and it made me giggle like a fiend, so I share it, as a balm to the soul.
aliumque:
et:
also: two things. 1) Ho. Lee. Shit. 2) ...waaay too much time on your hands, dude. but I bow to your epic patience and fiddly nature.
Five-teeen, fiveten! *cue Grosse Point Blank "ten...years! ten years! quote...go*
a little late, guys.
but. but. but. he. ehehe. ehehehehe.
so I was trying to find a clip on youtube of the aforementioned "ten...years! ten years!" quote, since I'm sure no one but my mother is going to understand it, but found this instead.
and it made me giggle like a fiend, so I share it, as a balm to the soul.
aliumque:
et:
also: two things. 1) Ho. Lee. Shit. 2) ...waaay too much time on your hands, dude. but I bow to your epic patience and fiddly nature.
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
why YouTube is bad.
and why The Boy should not be allowed free reign thereover.
and this is what started it all.
although you can blame me for this one.
and this is what started it all.
although you can blame me for this one.
inconceivable!
what? google maps doesn't know where something is?!
is true. I finally called my ride-along and said "um...you don't exist. how do I get to you by ungodly early tomorrow?" (I paraphrase.) Talked to someone at the main office, got transferred to someone else, then was told it's just off the freeway exit. which means it's about 1.3 miles away. biking took me 11 minutes, although I sat at the stoplight FOR EVER before gritting my teeth and biking through the red light.
add "stoplights that only run off of sensors" to the Hate List.
as I got there, the only way I saw that I was at the right building was the giant 'am-ba-laince' (oh, orvis/scott, you crack me up) pulling out of it. I got a very strange look from the driver, which said "um...why is there a girl on a bike in a glowing orange shirt that says "stay out of work, stay out of trouble, stay out of jail" on it? guys?"
I biked away without further interaction.
Someone's car "I'm locked now" beep sounds exactly like the cop car "watch it" siren beep. it's very unnerving.
On my way home I stopped at the general storelet and got a cherry garcia bar. mmmm. ben and jerry's = awesome. Ate it while wandering around on the dock, and spotted two moon jellys (one fresh, one...not so fresh) washed up on the rocks, so I meandered back to the mom and children eating their ice cream (popular idea, y'know) and mentioned that they were there, should they desire. last thing I heard walking back to my bike was "Whoaaaaa! they're huuuuuge!" and "eeeew!" and "we should take it home and show dad!"
my evil biological oceanography plan is furthered by such baby steps...muahahaha...
I realized that almost none of my current knitting projects are on ravelry. will fix that. eventually.
is true. I finally called my ride-along and said "um...you don't exist. how do I get to you by ungodly early tomorrow?" (I paraphrase.) Talked to someone at the main office, got transferred to someone else, then was told it's just off the freeway exit. which means it's about 1.3 miles away. biking took me 11 minutes, although I sat at the stoplight FOR EVER before gritting my teeth and biking through the red light.
add "stoplights that only run off of sensors" to the Hate List.
as I got there, the only way I saw that I was at the right building was the giant 'am-ba-laince' (oh, orvis/scott, you crack me up) pulling out of it. I got a very strange look from the driver, which said "um...why is there a girl on a bike in a glowing orange shirt that says "stay out of work, stay out of trouble, stay out of jail" on it? guys?"
I biked away without further interaction.
Someone's car "I'm locked now" beep sounds exactly like the cop car "watch it" siren beep. it's very unnerving.
On my way home I stopped at the general storelet and got a cherry garcia bar. mmmm. ben and jerry's = awesome. Ate it while wandering around on the dock, and spotted two moon jellys (one fresh, one...not so fresh) washed up on the rocks, so I meandered back to the mom and children eating their ice cream (popular idea, y'know) and mentioned that they were there, should they desire. last thing I heard walking back to my bike was "Whoaaaaa! they're huuuuuge!" and "eeeew!" and "we should take it home and show dad!"
my evil biological oceanography plan is furthered by such baby steps...muahahaha...
I realized that almost none of my current knitting projects are on ravelry. will fix that. eventually.
shrooms = bad.
don't do shrooms. or if you do, don't come to my ER. I'm just sayin'.
feet. so. hurty.
ate lunch at cafe on Tgraf. good. pulled pork sammich. got lemon ice freezy thing at different cafe, which was original destination, but had only fried chicken or egg salad sandwich for foods and we wanted something else. was also good.
found yarn store! not open mondays, though, which was sad.
sleep now.
feet. so. hurty.
ate lunch at cafe on Tgraf. good. pulled pork sammich. got lemon ice freezy thing at different cafe, which was original destination, but had only fried chicken or egg salad sandwich for foods and we wanted something else. was also good.
found yarn store! not open mondays, though, which was sad.
sleep now.
Monday, August 18, 2008
clini-what?
So.
Clinical in T-4 hours. I am suitably attired in Icky Uniform Pants of Death (mmm, polyester...) and Pseudo-Official Polo of Presentableness. (a stretch. I know. but it's not that bad of a polo, so 'of Poo' (which came to my mind first) isn't applicable)
But.
since I am feeling squicky because they didn't tell us anything about what was expected of us, I am also sporting one of my favoritest tshirts ever:
Best. Basketball. Team. Ever!
well, actually, not even remotely. Still. I loves it.
Clinical in T-4 hours. I am suitably attired in Icky Uniform Pants of Death (mmm, polyester...) and Pseudo-Official Polo of Presentableness. (a stretch. I know. but it's not that bad of a polo, so 'of Poo' (which came to my mind first) isn't applicable)
But.
since I am feeling squicky because they didn't tell us anything about what was expected of us, I am also sporting one of my favoritest tshirts ever:
Best. Basketball. Team. Ever! well, actually, not even remotely. Still. I loves it.
it's 23:59...
...do you know where your fiance is?
mine is chasing the cat around the apartment.
chasing.
the cat.
and peering over the couch at it, daring it to leap at him, and then whining when there's divots left in the leather (stuff it in your sock-hat and eat it, PETA) from The Kitteh launching himself off of / over.
So. Strange.
mine is chasing the cat around the apartment.
chasing.
the cat.
and peering over the couch at it, daring it to leap at him, and then whining when there's divots left in the leather (stuff it in your sock-hat and eat it, PETA) from The Kitteh launching himself off of / over.
So. Strange.
Sunday, August 17, 2008
I made (a tiny percentage of) this!
Not only is the Pratchgan finished and given unto The Pterry in person by The Seamstress to beat all seamstresses (that's seamstress as in sewing, not, y'know, a seamstress), Cherryred- but it is written of! in teh interwebs! in Spamish! (spain, sir.) Spanish! на русском языке!
in the San Francisco Examiner! (well, the online version thereof. still.)
in completely unrelated news, I was attacked by Meow Mix while making lackluster chicken carbonara, and The Kitteh was pleased.
Knitting on Sweeney Todd progresses nicely.
Knitting on Amber's Scarf progresses...not at all, because I still can't decide why I don't like it. I may have to (shame) frog it. Which would be A Pain In The Ass because I knit it in sections, lengthwise, being paranoid that I'd run out of yarn, then grafted them all together while I was Playing With AC Transit, my absolutely favorite activity ever. Not.
Have my clinical tomorrow. am nervous. have no idea what to expect, and am not exactly sure where I'm going, since there are two "Alta Bates" hospitals near Telegraph that aren't Alta Bates Summit. (because otherwise there would be three.) luckily, I get to eat food and drink coffee with Steph beforehand.
look! Kitty! (this is not our Kitteh)
.....yet.
in the San Francisco Examiner! (well, the online version thereof. still.)
in completely unrelated news, I was attacked by Meow Mix while making lackluster chicken carbonara, and The Kitteh was pleased.
Knitting on Sweeney Todd progresses nicely.
Knitting on Amber's Scarf progresses...not at all, because I still can't decide why I don't like it. I may have to (shame) frog it. Which would be A Pain In The Ass because I knit it in sections, lengthwise, being paranoid that I'd run out of yarn, then grafted them all together while I was Playing With AC Transit, my absolutely favorite activity ever. Not.
Have my clinical tomorrow. am nervous. have no idea what to expect, and am not exactly sure where I'm going, since there are two "Alta Bates" hospitals near Telegraph that aren't Alta Bates Summit. (because otherwise there would be three.) luckily, I get to eat food and drink coffee with Steph beforehand.
look! Kitty! (this is not our Kitteh)
.....yet.
if it doesn't work...add more legos.
So I've discovered another great knitting blog. Crazy Aunt Purl. and in reading through the archives, I have wanted to laugh out loud (but have restrained myself, since The Boy would be greatly confused if I were to try to explain and I'm sort of trying to keep him around and not scare him off, y'know)
but still. Today, I read this:
Up 'til now I have been using the paleolithic method of laundry, where the heat and pressure from the top of the pile cleans the clothes at the bottom of the pile. No diamonds emerged, but the socks did band together and try to stage an insurrection.
Hilarious. and I am guilty as charged of attempting the same.
You should go check her blog out.
also? Eomer is hot.
and one of the things I like best about the Lord of the Rings movies is the little tiny facial expressions that last only for a second- like Aragorn's "oh, look...orcs...I shouldn't...but...oh, hell, why not, let's go have some fun" at the top of the hill before the Fellowship splits up, and Legolas's glance of "Are you f*cking kidding me? I mean, I know, I'm the Piratical Elfboy of Troy, but still..." before he runs up the elephant-that-is-not-an-elephant-oliphant-thing.
(The Boy and I have been watching the Trilogy, if you couldn't tell.)
I still miss Tom Bombadil.
Oh, and this: LEGOS!
because "...if something doesn't work [is to] add more Lego stormtroopers..." as says Mike Stimpson.
but still. Today, I read this:
Up 'til now I have been using the paleolithic method of laundry, where the heat and pressure from the top of the pile cleans the clothes at the bottom of the pile. No diamonds emerged, but the socks did band together and try to stage an insurrection.
Hilarious. and I am guilty as charged of attempting the same.
You should go check her blog out.
also? Eomer is hot.
and one of the things I like best about the Lord of the Rings movies is the little tiny facial expressions that last only for a second- like Aragorn's "oh, look...orcs...I shouldn't...but...oh, hell, why not, let's go have some fun" at the top of the hill before the Fellowship splits up, and Legolas's glance of "Are you f*cking kidding me? I mean, I know, I'm the Piratical Elfboy of Troy, but still..." before he runs up the elephant-that-is-not-an-elephant-oliphant-thing.
(The Boy and I have been watching the Trilogy, if you couldn't tell.)
I still miss Tom Bombadil.
Oh, and this: LEGOS!
because "...if something doesn't work [is to] add more Lego stormtroopers..." as says Mike Stimpson.
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