hulk smash!

...would you like to hear the saga of the emeryville post office and the mysterious invisible package? well, technically 'parcel.'

of course you don't, but I'm going to tell you anyway, because if I don't, my options are a) scream b) make the title of this entry not hyperbole, or c) some combination of the above.

here we go.

I check the mail on the 13th of october. there's a litte orange slip saying that the USPS, in all its glory, tried to deliver a parcel to The Boy but we weren't here so please call to arrange a redelivery.

I called. I arranged a redelivery. I sat, trapped at home, awaiting the bell or the phone telling me to let the post office man in.
the package never came.
no little orange notice was left.

I called again. I arranged a re-redelivery. I sat, trapped at home, awaiting the bell or the phone telling me to let the post office man in.
the package never came.
no little orange notice was left.

I call again. I play tag with the automated 'tell me what you want' speak-menu thing. I play tag a lot. I go through the redelivery menu. it tells me the package has been returned to sender. I don't believe it.

I call again. I play tag trying to speak to a real person. I play a lot of tag. I finally get to a point where I speak to a real person- because I am given the number for the emeryville post office. (I tried to get it earlier, but all 411 gives you is the national 1800 number. The post office tells me (at this point I'm trying really hard to not be obviously pissed off at the guy on the phone with me.) that they have the package and it'll be sent tomorrow.

I hope so. I really hope so.

if not...hulk smash!