Movies...

Star Trek:
Awesome. Went to a matinee, but would have willingly paid a) actual movie prices b) actual imax prices and even c) actual imax prices at a real imax (not AMC's stupid I'm-an-imax-but-actually-not-really-teehee-suckers) in California. It reminded me of when I was younger and running around with Dithy and Teri debating whether Riker or Picard was better (as I recall Teri voted Riker and Dithy voted Picard) and adding to the Weirdo Chant and all manner of ridiculously awesome things. Am quite willing to see it again.

Terminator Salvation:
Terminatedest? oh wait, that's Die Hardester. Wrong franchise. Pretty good. Although at times I think Christian Bale forgot he wasn't being Batman and started to talk in the Batman voice. I can well understand why he could go into crazy flipout mode, especially during certain scenes. Watching the credits roll in the beginning was sort of entertaining, kind of like when the credits rolled at the end of Star Trek and everyone in the theatre said Winona Ryder?! WTF!? Also: I never ever ever ever want to see the governor of my state bare-ass naked on a giant fucking screen ever again. I don't care if he's digital. EW.

Angels and Demons:
Pretty good. I was very very disappointed when the credits in the beginning were rolling and then the title splash screen came on...and it wasn't the Angels and Demons ambigram. hello? whole damn book is based around ambigrams, and you give me a stupid boring text title? Also, totally gratuitous extended Tom Hanks-in-a-Speedo scene. Dudes. Ew.

In terms of previews:
Public Enemies looks good. (is Christian Bale in every movie?)
O You who are responsible for that heresy that is Sherlock Holmes? you're headed straight to the 9th circle of hell. seriously. Someone find a way to harness the energy caused by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle turning in his grave. Mr Downey Jr? Jeremy Brett is coming for you. he's coming back from the dead for you, and he's going to kick. your. ass. and I'm going to cheer him on. omgwtfbbq. There's not enough -OH groups in the world to make me go see that movie.
Julie and Julia could be entertaining.
The Sandra Bullock movie could also be entertaining. it's quite likely that all the funny bits are in the preview, but they're pretty funny bits.
Night at the Museum could be funny. The first one was surprisingly good, and I am usually heavily allergic to Ben Stiller.
Don't know about Up.
Land Of The Lost: ....Will Farrell...please...go...away...please...
Taking of Pelham 123: ...John Travolta is creeeeeepy.
Year One is another one of those weeeeelll...maybe....could be good, could be Zoolander.

I can't remember any others.

Oh but the nurse on the new showtime tv series? her twin works at one of my hospitals. (yes, *my* hospitals.)

Spiders.

There are no brown recluses in California. I've lived in the heart of recluse-dom and never encountered one. Black widows we got, though, in spades, though I haven't seen one here yet.

There are, however, GIANT FREAKING SPIDERS IN MY HOUSE.

So I'm checking my email and the cat bowl starts whining that it's out of water and the pump's running dry. I unplug the fountain-the italics will make sense here in a second-and go fill it. I return, fiddle with the dome until it sits right, then go to plug in the fountain. Huh, there's a dark blob on the bottom edge of the outlet plate. cat poo? no. dust bunny? no. what is- HOLY SHIT HUGE SPIDER. I call The Boy, who comes grudgingly* in.
The Boy: WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?! is that a black widow?
Me: uh...no.
The Boy: are you sure?
Me: uh...yeah. pretty damn hard to confuse a spindly shiny black little-head-giant-teardrop-abdomen with THE SPIDER OF FUCKING DEATH. (I am dramatically re-enacting this part. I just said yes.)
The Boy: holy shit that's big.
Me: Yeah. don't kill it yet I want to get a picture.

...so the cats seem to have kidnapped my little card reader thing (it is moments like this when I wish The Beast were still alive.) so I can't post the picture I took, which is probably OK because it wasn't the greatest of photos. Anyway. IT. WAS. BIG.

and now, I have to try to sleep...with two thoughts in my head.
1) how the hell did Monster Spider get in my house?
2) where the hell are his buddies?

*I am a cool cucumber when it comes to spiders outside my house. in the great outdoors, I am even fine as long as said spider stays off my person. (....and as long as I don't walk face first into a freakin' three-foot-wide garden spider web.) In my house, however, I am your stereotypical squeaky shivery omggetitoffgetitoffkillitkillitkillitkillitkillit girl climbing on chairs. Thus it is usual for The Boy to just say "so kill it," before eventually relenting and saving me from the horrible beast. I'm sure he's confused as to how exactly I made it through Entomology. (simple. Entomology =/= Arachnology.)

I have abby-someone cats.

Raz: why is box making funny noises?
Jayne: I can't get out of the box!!1! I CAN'T GET...oh wait. I claim this as my box.
Raz: ZOMG strange cat kill-oh, it's you.
Jayne: *bap*
Raz: what's this? I'll bite it. mmm, cardboard. ZOMG STRANGE CAT-oh, it's you.
Jayne: what's that? umf, my box is little. oo, shiny...slobber HEY you bit me.
Raz: now it's my box. can I fit in my box?
Jayne: no, mine.
Raz: MINE.
Jayne: fine, I don't want it anyway.
Raz: well I don't want it more. *huff*

happy 17. mai!

...you know, if I were here right now? it would be a lot cooler. it's about 12 degrees C. (54 ish F.) but probably just as light. even though it's almost 2300.

yay, midnattsolen. also, guess what I love about this weather map-
did you get it? the little partly cloudy symbols change from a sun to a moon as you go further south. ehehehe. also, poor Christian's getting rained on. looks like Kjersti's got sun though.

but yes! happy 17. mai and happy birthday craig ferguson. happy bay to breakers, which apparently this year will not have any nudity or keggers. riiight. I was going to go watch but dude...it's hot. way too hot to do anything of substance.

must...gain...energy...to...clean...fridge...wait, the fridge is cold. ok, I can handle that.

brain filtered for your safety.

from Mythtickle:

DADA!!!!! ehehehehehehe.


From the awesome Girl Genius:

eeeeebil social scientists. are there really any other kind?


more nemi! (that's a link to a newspaper, I can't seem to find a home site for Lise Myhre.)
That is the worst thing I have read....but now at least there aren't any more dustmites here!

I am very good.

why's that?

I'm not telling you how many bacteria you have in your body.

and from Brat-halla:

:) oh, Hod.

Man....

...I really want another tattoo. *sigh* Or maybe I just need to stop looking at ones like these: I mean...heckel? awesome? although I'd prefer some of Leuckart's stuff. and...oh, paleontology, one of my first loves...

but first....need money. money not earmarked for more important things. and need some printable temp tattoo paper.

hell yes.

Thanks for signing my petition for the environment! We need as many people as possible to take a stand for our world.

We've got to- it's the only planet I know of with longhaired men and chocolate.

happy belated may day.

Just got home from X-Men Origins: Wolverine. The Boy said that it was 'okay.' I thought it was pretty good, but then Hugh Jackman spent pretty much the entire movie shirtless. I can forgive a lot of plot mistakes/special effect mistakes for certain concessions. Usually. Troy's at the limit.
I was going to post this on the appropriate day but I forgot. so...belated April Fool's Day, too.

Luther professor wins role as Dumbledore

Date 4/1/2003 12:00 AM | Topic: News

Warner Brothers Pictures announced this week that Fred Nyline, Luther College Professor of Music and director of Luther's bands, is to replace the late Irish actor Richard Harris in the role of Albus Dumbledore in the Harry Potter franchise.

"The death of Richard Harris left pretty big magical shoes to fill," said Chris Columbus, director of the first two Potter films. "He became an icon for children around the world. At first we thought that replacing Harris would be a problem, as children would be comparing the new Dumbledore to the old one," Columbus added. "The executives at Warner knew that the actor we chose had to be perfect; we could not afford to fail."

"I really didn't expect to get it," said Nyline, "my grandchildren made me do the audition. I'd do anything for those kids."

Nyline is no stranger to the screen. He starred in the original 1947 production of "Miracle on 34th Street" as Santa Clause. He is also a veteran of major movie franchises, having played the British super-spy James Bond three times in the late 1960s.

As part of the audition process, Nyline had to meet with Harry Potter author J.K. Rowling. Rowling had dismissed other popular choices for Dumbledore such as Sir Ian Mckellan, who played the mighty Gandalf in the "Lord of the Rings" franchise. "Ian just didn't do it for me," Rowling said. "Don't get me wrong, he's great, but I really didn't think he captured the true spirit of Dumbledore. When Fred walked into my office, I knew immediately that he was the one. He is everything Dumbledore is. He's just so darned adorable! Kids will love him."

Children everywhere are responding very positively to Nyline. British children are already discarding their Richard Harris inspired Dumbledore dolls for the new line modeled after Nyline.

"Being an action figure is strange," Nyline told David Letterman during a Late Show appearance. "The kids back at Luther love it though. For my students, it's not much of a stretch to see me hold a magic wand. I conduct the band with a wand-like baton everyday."

Being a movie star has changed very little for Nyline. "He's like Superman!" exclaimed tuba player Tim Arnold ('04). "Even though he's Dumbledore now, he's still directing the band, and still dolling out the same wisdom he always has. Just the other day, before he flew off for another day of Potter filming he reminded us, 'Stay out of work, stay out of trouble, stay out of jail.' What a guy!"

Nyline is slated to portray the great wizard for the next five films, and regardless of the grueling filming schedule, he intends to keep on directing the bands at Luther. "Everything I do, I do for the kids. Being Dumbledore is just one more wonderful thing I can do for children everywhere."

Luther College is very excited for its distinguished faculty member. "This will attract a lot of students to Luther," says President Richard Torgerson. "Everyone will want to be in Dumbledore's band."

Frank Vomis
Chips Freek Editor