Wednesday, September 20, 2006


beginning the process of unpacking and getting my stuff organized so I can prepare for school in october. working on my travel arrangements now. creepyscary.

I'm in this whole little zone where little things have been making me twitchy- not escape from the small children twitchy, but the weird little heart-scrunch that you can't tell is a good thing or a bad thing. y'know? things like putting my key in the door of my parents' house in tacoma and feeling like it was mine and I'd leapt years in the future, checking the mail today as I wandered down the street to the starbuck's with my laptop (back from shop! gleee!) and feeling like everything was an overlay, an image projected onto a scrim to mask reality, lying awake last night before waking up to period-and-cramps-with-a-vengeance and it's just a weird day. weird. I don't want to be 23 yet. I think I want to be just buried in research- nice, safe, cuddly research- right now. I woke up crying a little because I was dreaming about our Jterm human dissection and anatomy class and that we got to meet our donors roger and nora and they got to tell us what was going on in their lives and how they'd come to the decision to give us such a gift. trying not to cry now.

damn reproductive biology and endocrinology.

aaand a troupe of four uniformed tweeners just walked into starbucks and holy crap did my brain do the special effect blurry time/space slide into japan. and then I blinked, and it was gone.

four o'clock is clearly the starbucks rush time in tacoma.

I'm worried about mom. there's a ton of work to be done in the house and it's enough that she's not gotten the chance to rest since...since ever, I guess. at least since this time last year. and I want to help but it seems like I can't, really. Dad's now a costco/ikeaholic, which is amusing.

Maybe I'll go for a bikeride tomorrow and everything will seem less...weird.

got to talk to matt last night, which was good. I got delegated into dinner because mom slashed her toe on the light table and dad was redoing my field dressing on her and so I was pretty distracted, which I feel bad about, but he said he'd call today maybe so that'll be good.

a beautiful puppy was keeping me company outside earlier. I want a puppy. well, dog. maybe I'll start a doginic- a clinic where you can come in and choose a dog from a variety of breeds and just play with it for an hour. or sit and just bury your hands in its fur for awhile. or romp and play "big 'dog' little dog" for awhile. there's a little house finch out there now eating some crumbs that the guy sitting by me spread out there earlier.

OH I got to blow glass in Coeur d'Alene on our last leg over here. curse my prediliction for attraction to expensive and equipment-intensive art. bronze casting? iron pouring? forgework? now glass? sigh. at least there's knitting, although that means I have to remember to start wearing gloves so I can look at pricetags before I touch things.

should probably grab coffee for road and papers and pack up and head home. when I can make my SD slot recognize cards I'll have a ton of lovely pictures to put up.

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